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Warmth you can't buy

December 10th 2012 20:19

Rain and heavy fog keeps me here. Nestled in the warmth of children. It surrounds me, flows through me, it consumes me. Everything inside me changes, I feel softer, kinder....more significant..I feel loved. They don't want to change me, they don't criticize....they just love.
Poems and books take on new meanings, i'm capable of reading them through their eyes.
If I can in any way however small have a hand in influencing or shaping these boys...oh
I feel so .......alive when they are near...vivid...I'm looking at the world through their eyes. ..oh how I need to have children, This is it's own degree of love,
A man's good love added to this and...I realize I don't yet know what real love is...well, I do but the blend of all of it together...the mix .It must be Nirvana.

I see things differently...just...colors seem brighter ......laughter sounds sweeter, it flows through me releases inhibitions frees something inside me that I have come to keep deep hidden.inside...that scream that won't come up and out. that explosion I keep repressing.......i'm too shy. but with these boys I let go..I become the the best of me.
That's it.....they bring out the best of me.

It's a good thing you cannot buy children like you can shoes or jeans....whew


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