Unprepared And Unaware:
February 1st 2008 06:14
The last thing anyone wants is to be utterly blind-sinded by the things we are least prepared for and least ready to deal with. In fact most people spend large portions of their entire lives trying to avoid these exact instances. Statistically speaking you have a better chance of being struck by lightning than being bit by a shark. Yet some people would sooner run in the rain than swim in the sea. Why is that? Maybe they'd rather die with the smell of burnt flesh and all of their nerves twitching than with teeth sinking into soft skin. How different are the two?
Today I was blind-sided. My death was neither by bright flash or aquatic killer. It was of the far more brutal and unrelenting variety. The kind of death that poisons slowly and lingers for a long while. The type of death that only flows from Human hands.
My unforseen impact came from the death of my wife. It's not to say that I did not know her death was coming. Cancer has a way of sinking in slowly and with morbid delight in the twisting, wrenching inescapable truth that it harbors. Yet I suppose that her final passing was still, in all it's delayed glory, a shocking blow that I have yet to overcome.
It's been nearly 2 months now and along with her leaving this world so has a good deal of the life that I shared with her. My career, kids, assets. They've all lost touch with me and I have lost touch with them.
Have you ever been blind-sided? Does the shock leave you reeling and dizzy? Does it leave you confused and bewildered? Does it knock you flat? Or does it just kill you?
This is one attempt to regather the pieces and follow them back to the source.
This is Check List Nation.
Today I was blind-sided. My death was neither by bright flash or aquatic killer. It was of the far more brutal and unrelenting variety. The kind of death that poisons slowly and lingers for a long while. The type of death that only flows from Human hands.
My unforseen impact came from the death of my wife. It's not to say that I did not know her death was coming. Cancer has a way of sinking in slowly and with morbid delight in the twisting, wrenching inescapable truth that it harbors. Yet I suppose that her final passing was still, in all it's delayed glory, a shocking blow that I have yet to overcome.
It's been nearly 2 months now and along with her leaving this world so has a good deal of the life that I shared with her. My career, kids, assets. They've all lost touch with me and I have lost touch with them.
Have you ever been blind-sided? Does the shock leave you reeling and dizzy? Does it leave you confused and bewildered? Does it knock you flat? Or does it just kill you?
This is one attempt to regather the pieces and follow them back to the source.
This is Check List Nation.
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Comment by Vixter
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Personally I chose to be numb so that you can't pass blame. The problem is it does catch up with you...like you said.
I know this is no business of mine, but I hope the kids get back in touch.
Take care
Comment by Susan Keeping
I survived but it took a long time to get over it, and even after ten years it still hurts.
I'm very sorry to hear about your wife...