suitably*woundedThe Rainbow TechoColor Upside Of Insanity
November 10th 2006 23:57
Just a couple of the more endearing things I've noticed in my tenure of being PVT. Nutso. Enjoy! All the better to eat you with, my dear. I mean, amuse you! Yeah, that's it.
Don't make that 'loco' sign at me. Because I'm watching, even with the eyes in the back of my head. Just don't ask me who they belong to.
When agoraphobia is in full swing, you don't have to worry about being a slave to fashion. Jetting to Paris is no longer a necessity and you can save your charge card for more important things, like being a member of the Clown of the Month club off eBay.
If you begin to hear voices or see aliens in your bedroom, you just ascribe their presence as a blessing from above that, finally, allows you to have some real life friends! And much better than the flesh and blood kind, you can get them to do whatever you want. Talk Klingon? No problem. Stand on their head while playing patty-cake? Sure. Eat 746 eggs at once? Cool Hand Luke ain't got nothin' on your new buddies.
For the OCD, channel it into something positive. You could always call your in-laws, the ones who say you never do. Then do it again. And again. And again, again, againagainagain. Surely, that'll bring a smile to their faces and put a spring in their step. Surely. Surely, surely, surelysurely.
How about depression? I feel that's the best time for a contest to be in order. Find your favorite cat (or hell, kidnap someone else's, they'll probably never notice) and see who can do absolutely nothing for the longest. Now take heed, those who dare attempt this hazardous feat, you probably canNOT win. Such is the vagaries of life that allow a feline to sleep 72 a day. Just sayin'. There are other categories in the same vein, but are not encouraged for neophytes. Once you've at least got to your fuchsia belt (that doesn't go with the white shoes, especially after Labor Day), we'll talk again.
Anxiety can be a dick, so I say make it work for you. For example, say you actually feel up to doing some mundane task but you're too jittery to know how on earth you'll accomplish anything, put a scrubber or a cloth on your butt. Waxing the floors or polishing the silver should be a breeze. I've also known it to conquer windows or mirrors if you switch the location to your hand. If you've got boobs big enough, please email me for further options. This is a family blog after all.
Finally (hehehe), about the only thing suicidal ideation is for is finding hilarious new phrases to convert it to. I haven't heard many (outside me own noggin), but thus far, "Remember kids, it's down the path, not across the road!" seems to be popular. All the ones I've come up with, sound exceptionally week. So, if you got any to share, bring it.
This message has been brought to you by The Society for Levity Among Loons and their acolytes.
Peaces tonight y'all,
~Kemi
Don't make that 'loco' sign at me. Because I'm watching, even with the eyes in the back of my head. Just don't ask me who they belong to.
When agoraphobia is in full swing, you don't have to worry about being a slave to fashion. Jetting to Paris is no longer a necessity and you can save your charge card for more important things, like being a member of the Clown of the Month club off eBay.
If you begin to hear voices or see aliens in your bedroom, you just ascribe their presence as a blessing from above that, finally, allows you to have some real life friends! And much better than the flesh and blood kind, you can get them to do whatever you want. Talk Klingon? No problem. Stand on their head while playing patty-cake? Sure. Eat 746 eggs at once? Cool Hand Luke ain't got nothin' on your new buddies.
For the OCD, channel it into something positive. You could always call your in-laws, the ones who say you never do. Then do it again. And again. And again, again, againagainagain. Surely, that'll bring a smile to their faces and put a spring in their step. Surely. Surely, surely, surelysurely.
How about depression? I feel that's the best time for a contest to be in order. Find your favorite cat (or hell, kidnap someone else's, they'll probably never notice) and see who can do absolutely nothing for the longest. Now take heed, those who dare attempt this hazardous feat, you probably canNOT win. Such is the vagaries of life that allow a feline to sleep 72 a day. Just sayin'. There are other categories in the same vein, but are not encouraged for neophytes. Once you've at least got to your fuchsia belt (that doesn't go with the white shoes, especially after Labor Day), we'll talk again.
Anxiety can be a dick, so I say make it work for you. For example, say you actually feel up to doing some mundane task but you're too jittery to know how on earth you'll accomplish anything, put a scrubber or a cloth on your butt. Waxing the floors or polishing the silver should be a breeze. I've also known it to conquer windows or mirrors if you switch the location to your hand. If you've got boobs big enough, please email me for further options. This is a family blog after all.
Finally (hehehe), about the only thing suicidal ideation is for is finding hilarious new phrases to convert it to. I haven't heard many (outside me own noggin), but thus far, "Remember kids, it's down the path, not across the road!" seems to be popular. All the ones I've come up with, sound exceptionally week. So, if you got any to share, bring it.
This message has been brought to you by The Society for Levity Among Loons and their acolytes.
Peaces tonight y'all,
~Kemi
| 78 |
| Vote |
Subscribe to this blog
Comment by Anonymous
Comment by Bryn
Horrorphile
Comment by suitably*wounded
Eternal Days; Author: Illness, M.
Ok, maybe just a tad.
Comment by suitably*wounded
Eternal Days; Author: Illness, M.
I can't speak to texture, but as for color? I'd break them down like this:
Madness = Purple, for sure. Think Barney.
Insanity = Black. It has to be because of all the wandering around in the dark.
Lunacy = Turquois, the brighter and more obnoxious the better.
And I do believe that all of them are hot, almost burning to the touch. Now don't get me started on sounds.... I'll simply leave you freaked out here.
Comment by Bryn
Horrorphile
Comment by suitably*wounded
Eternal Days; Author: Illness, M.
Comment by Bryn
Horrorphile