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They didn't let me write the REAL thing because it was a bit too harsh. But here it is!
Walking into Sydney’s cheapest hairdresser I experienced the same feelings that usually accompany me on a visit to the dentist – fear and apprehension. It’s no secret that a bad haircut is the arbiter of social humiliation and I, while used to forking out at least two figures for a good trim, could be forgiven for shaking at the thought of subjecting myself to an $8.90 do.
Inside things weren’t so bad. The congregation of flies in the middle of the salon was doing wonders to distract me from the brown patches of goo on the floor, while a large cabinet of assorted goods to my left reassured me that should I need a towel, noodles or a good pair of sneakers during my haircut, I’d be set.
Finally Mr Kwan emerged from somewhere in the back, apparently still in the middle of his mid-morning ritual of putting on a shirt. I was directed to the only seat in the room – a somewhat antique brown imitation leather barber’s chair, complete with masking tape to hold down its escaping foam insides – after which Mr Kwan set to work. Chop, chop, chop he went, wither, wither, wither I went. This man was serious about hairdressing – there was no need for fancy things like sharp scissors and hair products. Just a spritz of water and Tchaikovsky’s Swan Lake was all he needed (he even stopped halfway through to flip the tape). After what seemed like an eternity, but was probably closer to ten minutes, Mr Kwan stood back to admire his work. Indeed, it was not as bad as I feared. After all, rat’s tails are coming back in fashion now aren’t they?
P.S The damage was worth a $150 haicut with my local hairdresser, who was so shocked she almost fainted.
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You are driving in wet weather, cursing quietly to yourself, when a warning flashes up on your dashboard. The car in front has just told your car there is icy road ahead.
What might appear to be a science-fiction scenario is actually the way of the very near future.
Researchers from the Network Research Lab at the University of California, Los Angeles (UCLA) and car manufacturer BMW are working on an autonomous, self-organising communication network that connects cars to each other, allowing them to collect data from their immediate surroundings, process it and exchange it with other cars.
The wireless network means cars will be able to talk to each other about traffic conditions as well as allowing drivers to download movies, images and songs.
Cars will be able to hold a wide range of data, from the headlights, the fog lamps or brake lights, as well as the ABS system, windscreen wipers and external thermometer, making for a well-informed driving experience.
The car's program senses the situation of the car and monitors weather, traffic, road conditions and surroundings. The network could give emergency workers a reliable channel on which to issue warnings.
The software is designed to use existing wireless channels. The typical range has been between 100 and 300metres.
The US Department of Transportation has embraced the new technology, developing a dedicated short-range communications standard signal that will allow high-speed communications between vehicles or between vehicles and the roadside. A car can access the internet from hot spots, or, if outside a hot spot, talk to another car that has what it wants.
"In some applications, a car just needs internet content, say a local map or picture," Professor Mario Gerla, of the UCLA Network Research Lab told the ABC.
"The car can get the data second-hand from another car that was earlier connected to the internet and happened to have downloaded that map or picture."
Manufacturers such as BMW plan to install the wireless connectivity equipment in their cars to enable this car-to-car communication.
If the concept of a talking car unnerves you, consider the big picture - no longer will exchanges between road users be limited to horn blasts. So don't be alarmed when the car in front says hello - it's welcoming a new age in technology.
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The gecko is well-known for its adhesive acrobatics and wall-scaling techniques but now this small lizard is helping scientists out of a sticky situation of their own.
Recent studies of the gecko’s spatula-tipped toe hairs (called setae) have revealed the secret behind the lizard’s uncanny sticking power - a quick-release mechanism that allows it to stick to surfaces without liquid or surface tension and then detach with minimal effort. Researchers in the US now claim they can utilise this quick-release mechanism to manufacture advanced car breaking systems which could stop a car travelling at 80 km per hour in a distance of just five metres, using only one third of a square metre of this reptilian glue.
Geckos are already evolutionary wonders – they are the only lizard to make chirping sounds in social interactions with other geckoes, they have no eyelids and in defense they are known to expel a nasty-smelling substance and feces onto their opponent. Some species are even parthenogenic, meaning the female doesn’t require the services of the male to reproduce. Gecko stickiness is unlike any conventional adhesives, which often stick with ease but only detach with a great amount of force (as anyone who has ever tried peeling off those plastic wall hooks will tell you). By contrast, research has proven that gecko hairs adhere strongly and detach easily. The attractive force which holds geckoes to surfaces is a product of inter-molecular interactions between the extremely fine and numerous setae on its toes (almost 500,000 on each foot) and the surface itself.
But the real trick it seems is some clever trigonometry on the part of extraordinary creature.
Biologist Keller Autumn, of the Lewis and Clark College in Oregon, USA, and his colleagues were the first to look at the actual force that is required to detach gecko hairs from their surface, and how this force changed in relation to the angle at which it was applied. For example, Autumn and his team found that when the hairs lie at an angle of 30 degrees to the surface the gecko could resist weights up to 130 kilograms, but at angles of over 90 degrees the hairs would begin to peel off. Due to the solidity of each setae, not a single one is damaged in this process, allowing the gecko a lifetime of Spiderman-like agility. Autumn has no doubt that gecko adhesive could solve a great deal of problems and one day be of use in car breaking systems.
As he told New Scientist: “It’s such a bizarre solution to an engineering problem. No one would have ever though of it if it hadn’t evolved in geckos.”
But don’t rush to the sales floor just yet, for it could be at least ten years before gecko glue becomes a viable option in automobile safety.
“Scaling things up creates big problems,” Autumn said, “We know it’s a challenge none of the virtual gecko adhesives are capable of doing.”
Looks like we’ll have to hold on to those plastic wall hooks just a little while longer.
P.S. Someone, I'm guessing a sub, put the word 'pretty' in this article before it went to print. Can you imagine? 'Pretty'! What the hell man. As if I'd ever use that word. As if anyone ever uses that word to describe anything. He also didn't know how to spell 'Spiderman'.
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Here is a bioethical dilemma concerning recreational drugs and our society’s ongoing quest for a final solution.
We are all aware of delta9-tetrahydrocannabinol (THC), the principle psychoactive ingredient in marijuana. Marijuana is a psychoactive cannabinoid and in humans, psychoactive cannabinoids like marijuana produce euphoria, enhancement of sensory perception, difficulties in concentration and impairment of memory. Anyone who has ever smoked a jay or knows someone who has can vouch for this. The cognitive deficiencies seem to persist after withdrawal, which is why we’re taught that taking recreational drugs is bad and why we’re forced to look at those posters on city buses of kids looking sad because they apparently smoked some pot.
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Yes, it's true. It really has.
I've always been such a strong advocate for journalistic integrity, with the aspiration of becoming someone like, say, Robert Fisk. So there I'd be, defending journalism to my friends, who all think the media, and journalism especially, is screwed.
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Just a little ramble on drugs this week.
The late, and great, comedian Bill Hicks once said these famous words: "I believe drugs have done some good things for people," (famous I suppose only insofar as Tool fans are concerned, but nevertheless).
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Yet another triumph for freedom of information this week (it's a recurring theme lately, I know).
The Guardian reports that British scientists are leading an international effort to create a database that will supply researchers around the world with access to all the known geological information about every single country that exists.
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Through some divine intervention I found myself invited to the media launch of the PS3 here in Sydney. I of course wasn't going to turn that down, even though I have no intention of ever purchasing one, or ever liking one, but free canapes, alcohol and new games did all the decision making for me.
Alas, it was a pretty damn good day.
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My friend and I were sitting at MacDonald’s one day. We were talking and just watching the kids play in the playground when we witnessed some disturbing behaviour.
A few parents were calling their children to come and eat and the children were not answering and telling their parents ‘no’, with one boy (about 9 years old) even telling his mum to ‘shut up’ because he ‘wanted to keep playing’.
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