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Surviving Rural Life - by bumpkin

note to my readers

September 21st 2006 23:38

Thank you to those who have been reading my surviving rural life pages. I appreciate your votes and reading. I have now changed my blog and my storieswill be under livingrural.net You can access them through http://www.livingrural.net. The best is yet to come.
I don't know if this is in the "rules' but it seems a shame to change names and not take you with me on my journey! The aim of my site is to both entertain and inform. There is a lot of talk (especially in the country) about a lack of knowledge from children living in the city about country life. In earlier days this worked both ways but these days most children in the country have spend time in the city, but the reverse is sadly lacking. Some employers require their workers to have a "stint in the country" and it is not necessarily as daunting as one would think. Just helping people to see that those of us who live and work in the country have a lot in common with city people and the problems and joys are just as real- perhaps with a slightly different twist on them, may be useful. Also there are those who would have spend time in the bush and can relate to the stories. There is that saying "You can take the boy out of the country, but you can't take the country out of the boy."

"Aussiecityliving" (I think that is the blog) talks about city life, and mine is rural life, so while he/she fights off the people traffic in the subway, I might be fighting off the sheep in the sheep yards.
Hope you can stay with me on the new site. Let me know when you have found me please. Thank you again. bumpkin

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Ten favourite types of Nicknames

September 20th 2006 10:43

When one lands in a country town, one discovers that most men don't go by their real name, so you need to match their nicknames with their character, if you are ever going to work out who is who around the place.
1. Some have to do with the size of the bloke: Booty: because he is as thin as a bootlace and Pip (pip squeak) and then Horse and Bear because they are the opposite - large..
2.Some are people that others don't want around much: Arget (Agh Get....) and Opium (slow working dope)
3. All Kelly's are called Ned, and all Taylor's Squizzy - after the gangsters.

4. Some talk too much: Motormouth and Diahorrea.
5. You would think that Bulldust was a bit the same - talking a lot of rubbish, but he only got his name because there were three people in the district with the same name and he happened to be the youngest!
6. Gunner: because he is always going to do something.
7. Vandy: because he looks like the character out of F Troop - Van der Veld
8. Lefty - Mr Wright
9. Oz , because he is a typical Aussie,
10 and finally The Whiz - who of course is Jeff Farmer: who we claim as a district hero - who can do things with a football that others only dream of.

I am sure this is not just a country town activity - boarding schools are also a hive of wonderful imaginative nicknaming! Does it still go on or are we getting so politically correct that it is becoming a dying art? Is it the art of being clever and not hurtful? Or were people always hurt but we were insensitive to it?

Have you got any favourites?

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Blood and gore

September 19th 2006 01:47

Sheep skin at The Kodja Place Copyright: Wendy Thorn

What a culture shock it is for a young partner of a country bloke to suddenly have landed on the verandah table the gutted carcus of some sheep she had seen running in the yards the day before. If she is lucky she has been warned, as most farmers kill the night before and the meat hangs wrapped in a sheet for the night - a sheet, by the way, she will be expected to wash soon afterwards. (Forensics would have a field day trying to sort out the blood and guts) In earlier days the chopping of the animal would have happened outside with the chopping block and chops would appear with sharp pieces of bones sticking out at weird angles. I think that is why there were so many stews. What else can you do with a piece of meat like that! Now, many farms have their own meat saw - which is fine when it works. Now, all one has to worry about is will the user make it through without losing a finger and what on earth do I do with all these bits of meat?
The only solution is to think of something else and just get in there and get the hands dirty/bloody. Chops of varied sizes, roast - 2 leg and 2 shoulder, flaps if you are into them, neck chops if you are really keen and the rest goes into bags with DOG written on it. The dog, of course is hanging around anyway looking for the odd shaped bits that don't quite make it to the table. It is important to leave one or two packs of meat out of the freezer, so that you can have them for tea that night - I mean why did you think they were killed - someone wants mutton, not chicken for tea!
The clean up - washing knives, the meat saw, table, floor etc should be done by the user of the saw- so if one is clever one takes a while to pack and label the bags, so that the cleaning is finished about the same time as the freezer door is shut.
I have been involved with the development of displays at The Kodja Place, an Interpretive Centre in Kojonup W.A. Here we spent ages discussing all the things that made us who we are in our town. The wool industry featured, but how could we display the other reason we keep sheep - the meat industry? The sheep skin was the result and a peep show of the more gory bits. But here was a thought that stuck in my mind. One of the local Noongar (Aboriginal) women made the comment "Well I came from the city too - how do you think I felt when my husband brought home a kangaroo!" Point taken.

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A Poultry Affair

September 18th 2006 03:55

A great discovery

Most self-respecting farm has some form of poultry. Some people used to have turkeys, so that there was something for the Christmas dinner – but they are fairly noisy and have a face only their mother would love, so they are not as popular as in the past. Others swear by (and at) geese because they are better than any guard dog at keeping visitors and snakes away from the household. Others prefer bantam hens – I don’t know why- maybe they just don’t like a full sized egg for breakfast…. However, a majority of farmers want poultry to have “free” eggs so they buy either red, white or black hens.
Connoisseurs will specialize in one variety and will swear that the reds are friendly and the black are bad tempered, but in my study of these creatures most have absolutely no personality whatsoever. Mind you there is always the one chook who will come to greet you when you visit their enclosure and proceed to get under your feet every step of the way and may even peck a greeting at your passing boot. If there is a policy of killing one for dinner, that will be the one – however, as it’s easier to go the supermarket and get one ready to cook for under $10.00, it is probably quite safe. (If you have ever killed, plucked, gutted and cleaned a chook and smelt the wet feathers, you will understand why there is a certain resistance to this process in the kitchens of this land

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slip slop slap-wear that hat!

September 16th 2006 07:13

This is the typical leg of a farmer after a couple of days in the sun. The white is where the farm boot and socks have been. The red signifies the change from farm jeans to shorts. If you are looking for a bloke with an even tan - don't look at a farmer!

no such thing as an even tan!

Farmers have become very aware of the need to protect themselves from the sun. They have had enough friends having skin cancers removed, to know some care is required. Slopping on the suncream is not always practical especially if it is getting mixed with dust. The shirts stays on more these days - even if they have sleeves removed - a concession somewhere between the blue singlet and the full shirt. However, there seems to be no trouble getting a hat of some sort on their head. Some,however are of dubious value.

Yes, of course I took a hat

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The lastest fashion?

September 15th 2006 10:16

For my readers who have seen this before, apologies, I have just discovered how to add post categories and I would love a comment or two from the fashion conscious among the readers -so have resubmitted this under Fashion. Hope that is allowed - and I promise not to do it again!

What's this with the holey jeans?
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Beware the orange school bus

September 13th 2006 15:20

Fanning out across the countryside from as early as 7.00am every school day, are bright orange buses traveling out to pick up school children for their day’s education. Up until about sixty years ago, children had less distances to travel as they went to many small one or two teacher schools. True some walked, rode horse, arrived in their father’s old truck or rode their bicycles, but attendance was as valued by the small communities as much as it is today. Now some buses have almost a round trip of two hundred kilometers each day and small children who live far away settle in for an extra hour’s sleep once they are on the bus in the morning. Buses do not have direct routes to travel but must weave in and out among the side roads to ensure each child is within three kilometers for pick-up.
The bus drivers are an important person in a student’s life. The same driver may experience a child’s first day at school, first award, first fight, first rejected love and may see them through to their first graduation from primary school or high school. They are the first adult, apart from the teacher, that the child sees after school and may be privy to that excitement of “what we did at school today” or the unfairness of a punishment they received. The drivers need to be like a mother, a teacher, a policeman and have the best concentration on the road ahead that is possible.
Most trips are fairly uneventful but here are some incidents that happened to school buses in our district

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What’s this with the holey jeans!?

September 12th 2006 05:09

What is it with the fashion for young men these days? I really don’t want to sound like an old fuddy-duddy. I have been through the black beanie pulled over the eyes and the shorts with one hundred pockets that are impossible to iron. I even relented to the jeans that have been stone washed so they look as if they are five years old when you buy them. Mind you I did make a suggestion that if my son went to St Vinnie’s or the local Op shop he could get them for 50c. But now I discover that the most expensive jeans in the shops these days have actually got holes in them and are of course frayed around the cuffs.
Give me a break! – I could give you at least half a dozen pairs of jeans like that right now. They are sitting in the mending pile at home. I could also include ingrained grass stains, manure stains and a few blood stains - adding character to the product

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Peter Brock’s Legacy

September 11th 2006 03:14

Much is being said and written about Peter Brock’s place in the memory of Australians and, as services are being arranged and conducted, many who knew him personally can give their thoughts. There have been comments regarding his contribution to the cause of making vehicles safer and encouraging young drivers to respect their cars and their own abilities. All this is worthwhile and there is no doubt that both in changes to cars and through his words, lives have been saved.
There is going to be an inquest into the accident using a “black box” installed in his car that may help find the cause. Perhaps that too will help to make changes to save lives. However, I do not feel that it will tell us much more than we already can know as to what caused the accident

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Another opening, another show

September 10th 2006 05:40

make that costume, mum

The local school play
I should have gone to the school play/musical in town. Not because I have any kids performing in “Get Smarter”. Nor because I teach any of the students at the District High School. I should be there because it’s the noble town- spirited thing to do.
I know what has been happening over the last few weeks. All extra curriculum subjects in Year Eight, Nine and Ten have been cancelled while the kids had their singing practice and costume fittings. Even upper primary kids have learnt the songs to help add volume to the chorus line. The hairdressers in town have been booked out to ensure the hair-dos fit the era. The Shire hall has been invaded by gum-chewing teenagers every evening after school for the last six weeks and keen parents have been driving into town at all sorts of odd hours to take their child to and from rehearsals and the six performances. However this is the cross they will bear to support the English teacher who has directed such plays every second year for almost the last twenty years

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September 2006

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