Palm Trees Cause War
August 30th 2006 07:16
Palm Trees Cause War
Run a quick survey of any group of people and ask them if war is a ‘good thing’ or a ‘bad thing’. So far I have yet to find any group, including soldiers that will vote that war in itself is a good thing. However if war is so bad then why are we spending so much time engage in war? Why do we spend budgets on our defense incase of war? It is because the forces that cause wars are stronger than the forces that cause peace. So what are these forces and how do they operate? Is there a dark ominous force so powerful that it drives nations to war and civil wars? Some say that there exists secret pact and societies that manipulate civil unrest for their own purposes. Others say that religion is the cause. Others say that it is greed and corporation that create wars. Perhaps you were informed that the problem is in the genes. Some people are born with an evil gene and others are not. I am not here to defend these theories as I believe that they are all equally incorrect. So rather than leave everyone in confusion as to what I say are the causes of trouble I will forward my own analysis and explanation.
Wars are caused by Palm Trees. Or to put in the way this concept was first presented to me I would say: Wherever you get palm trees you get problems. This may at first seem like a bazaar statement but if you look at the evidence the assertion is very hard to disprove.
Let us first look at the most troubled places in the world today and see what common denominators we can find. The Middle East comes to the top of the pile. Iraq is famous for its oil and for its date palms. It has also been in three conflicts in the last twenty years. Lebanon and Israel both have an ample supply of palm trees and have had two major conflicts in the last twenty years. Israel’s palm tree problem seems to be so great that it has been unable to escape conflict since it was formed after World War 2. Iran has palm trees and has revolution, dictators, war with Iraq and is now edging closer to conflict with the west. In fact if not for the oil the Middle East would only be known for its palm trees. Now let us look at a continent that is constantly in conflict. Africa has been quoted as having some of the worst and bloody civil wars in recent times. Listing the nations is an exercise in listing the conflict associated with each one. South and Central America has had so much trouble over the last two centauries that I scarcely know where to begin. Here too palm trees are in no short supply. Asia too has been unable find peace where logically it should exist. The Philippines has its rebels; Vietnam its Vietnam War; Cambodia had Pol Pot; East Timor had its recent riots. Everywhere that I see palm trees there is trouble.
On the other hand Europe had been edging closer to stability of the last few decades and is famous for its Palm Trees. Canada lives in relative peace with its pine tree rather than trouble attracting palm trees. Australia famous for Gum trees and has never had a civil war. USA has not had a conflict since the South (the states with palm trees) was subdued in its civil war.
I have not as yet been able to deduce why palm trees have such a detrimental effect to the peace of mankind. It could have to do with the fumes from the palm leaves or some kind of palm tree virus that causes such violence. However the relationship between trouble and palm trees is overwhelming. The only option we have is the complete deforestation of all palm trees.
So what do you think are palm trees the cause of war?
If so should we destroy them all to prevent future wars?
Run a quick survey of any group of people and ask them if war is a ‘good thing’ or a ‘bad thing’. So far I have yet to find any group, including soldiers that will vote that war in itself is a good thing. However if war is so bad then why are we spending so much time engage in war? Why do we spend budgets on our defense incase of war? It is because the forces that cause wars are stronger than the forces that cause peace. So what are these forces and how do they operate? Is there a dark ominous force so powerful that it drives nations to war and civil wars? Some say that there exists secret pact and societies that manipulate civil unrest for their own purposes. Others say that religion is the cause. Others say that it is greed and corporation that create wars. Perhaps you were informed that the problem is in the genes. Some people are born with an evil gene and others are not. I am not here to defend these theories as I believe that they are all equally incorrect. So rather than leave everyone in confusion as to what I say are the causes of trouble I will forward my own analysis and explanation.
Wars are caused by Palm Trees. Or to put in the way this concept was first presented to me I would say: Wherever you get palm trees you get problems. This may at first seem like a bazaar statement but if you look at the evidence the assertion is very hard to disprove.
Let us first look at the most troubled places in the world today and see what common denominators we can find. The Middle East comes to the top of the pile. Iraq is famous for its oil and for its date palms. It has also been in three conflicts in the last twenty years. Lebanon and Israel both have an ample supply of palm trees and have had two major conflicts in the last twenty years. Israel’s palm tree problem seems to be so great that it has been unable to escape conflict since it was formed after World War 2. Iran has palm trees and has revolution, dictators, war with Iraq and is now edging closer to conflict with the west. In fact if not for the oil the Middle East would only be known for its palm trees. Now let us look at a continent that is constantly in conflict. Africa has been quoted as having some of the worst and bloody civil wars in recent times. Listing the nations is an exercise in listing the conflict associated with each one. South and Central America has had so much trouble over the last two centauries that I scarcely know where to begin. Here too palm trees are in no short supply. Asia too has been unable find peace where logically it should exist. The Philippines has its rebels; Vietnam its Vietnam War; Cambodia had Pol Pot; East Timor had its recent riots. Everywhere that I see palm trees there is trouble.
On the other hand Europe had been edging closer to stability of the last few decades and is famous for its Palm Trees. Canada lives in relative peace with its pine tree rather than trouble attracting palm trees. Australia famous for Gum trees and has never had a civil war. USA has not had a conflict since the South (the states with palm trees) was subdued in its civil war.
I have not as yet been able to deduce why palm trees have such a detrimental effect to the peace of mankind. It could have to do with the fumes from the palm leaves or some kind of palm tree virus that causes such violence. However the relationship between trouble and palm trees is overwhelming. The only option we have is the complete deforestation of all palm trees.
So what do you think are palm trees the cause of war?
If so should we destroy them all to prevent future wars?
| 61 |
| Vote |
Subscribe to this blog
Comment by jon
Orble News
Urban Hint
Blog Adviser
Jon's Bookmarks
Debate Battle
Orblepedia
Orble Notes
Sydney WeekendNotes