Matt Savage

Recently the bell weather dating site Match.com has been usurped as the top Internet dating site in the world by non-other than former under dog PlentyofFish.com.

internet dating sites plenty of fish match

This is not a surprise that a free dating site would eventually overtake a paid dating site. For the simple reason that people can leave their online profiles up on the free sites indefinitely compared to the limited amount of time provided from the paid sites.

So what does this mean? Well, one could assume that Plenty of Fish is the most popular destination and that it would also be the place where one would have the best odds at courtship. In my opinion, I think this type of thinking would be wrong.

As stated in the Online Dating Paradox, more choice does not always equal more success. Also, it could mean that there will be an ever greater increase in inactive profiles on PlentyofFish compared to Match.com, which makes one's efforts at contacting a potential date more likely to be sent into the Internet dating void.

This isn't to say that I prefer the paid dating sites over the free dating sites. I actually believe that paid dating sites are a waste of time and money. This is because the motives of a paid Internet dating site are counter-intuitive to their product - getting people into relationships. This concept is thoroughly explained in a recent post by the OkTrends blog.

So if paid dating sites are crap and the free dating sites are growing too large and diluted, where are we supposed to go to fulfill our Internet dating desires?

The answer is to move to a niche dating site. Move to a smaller free dating site in which the profile market is not diluted and more focused towards your personal lifestyle. Examples of niche dating sites could be JDate for the Jewish singles, any number of other religious or Christian dating sites, vegetarian dating sites, Fitness Singles dating site for those who are all about the excercising, and pretty much any subset of life you can think of; there's a dating site out there for you.

What online dating sites do you use?

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80:20 Rule of Online Personals

May 4th 2010 22:56

In the underground seduction community there is often a term referred to as the 80/20 rule of dating. The 80/20 rule states that in general, approximately 20 percent of the male population is courting 80 percent of the female population.

The reason that many dating and relationship gurus believe in the 80/20 rule is because they realize that there is a smaller percentage of alpha males within the general population and that those same alpha males have more choice amongst the general female population.

Now this isn't to say that the average guy isn't going on dates or getting into relationships. The theory is that those 80 percent of the average male population simply has a smaller number of lifetime relationships, whereas the other 20 percent of alpha males have many more lifetime relationships with an even more active dating lifestyle.

So how does this rule apply to online dating? Unfortunately, for men at least, the Internet dating scene is much more skewed than the traditional 80/20 split that the relationship gurus talk about in real life.

The 95:5 Rule of Online Personals

As discussed in my last post regarding the Online Dating Paradox theory, the hypothetical efficiencies of the Interwebs have caused a massive disruption in the dating market between men and women. Because of this disruption where women have more choice and men have less choice than the real world, the odds for men decrease tremendously.

There is one group of men who do benefit greatly from online personals and that is those top 5% of really good looking guys. These top 5 percent are now dating 95 percent of the females online. What results is small group of online male players with a lot of choice and a large group of average frustrated men. This is the 95:5 rule of online personals.

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Understanding the Online Dating Paradox

May 3rd 2010 21:19

In an ever expanding virtual world in which billions of people now depend on the Internet for a vast range of handling their affairs more efficiently, there is still one thing that the Internet has failed to make easy - dating.

Since the Interwebs began, people have been flirting and "hooking-up" from their online experiences and eventually gave way to multi-million dollar online dating Industry. This industry, so large, has enticed many people into the realms of online dating, so much, that the very act has become mainstream.

Is online dating really that efficient at pairing lonely soles into happy mates? Well, if you've hung around on any online personals for longer than a month you'll probably realize that the whole process is actually quite frustrating for most. I would even venture to say that online dating is even harder than the traditional courtship route. Here-in lies the paradox.

The Online Dating Paradox states that the more choice in potential mates that are available for courtship than the harder it is for that person to find a potential mate.

Basically, as men and women are faced with an almost window shopping like experience, their standards and courtship process change from what would be considered the norm in an off-line environment.

Women's standards in men increase dramatically due to the huge influx of male suitors contacting them. These women now have choice in a higher standard of man than what they could normally get in real life.

On the opposite spectrum, men's standards become increasingly lower and more desperate. As the large population of online men compete in the virtual dating market place for the every pickier females, it's no surprise that a decent man will be chasing after women who are significantly below their standards in real life.

As illustrated above, this is what I refer to as the online dating paradox. While the Internet has made most things in life more efficient, it has also made the dating market a seriously flawed and confusing place. This blog will serve to help those brave soles who wish to seek love through the virtual dating realms and do so in a more efficient and practical approach.

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