The Voices in my HeadLying Eyes
December 28th 2006 02:29
The nature of people, of humanity, boggles my mind, sometimes.
I am a pretty cynical person. When someone manages to pull one over on me, it is rare. I never forget it, though. It makes me a better person because it makes me aware. It gives me experience for the next one that crosses my path. They are always further and farther between...and I always think the same thing when it happens,
"Well, at least it will be a very long time before it happens again."
So, today, I am rejoicing a bit. At least I know it will be a long time from now. One less thing to worry about, I say.
I have a friend who is going through something similiar, who should have listened to her gut instinct and is now facing court battles and life long scars. This is also for her...
This poem is about the sometimes twisted and evil thing that disguises itself as friendship. How we desperately want to believe what is being said...and how all too often, we should have listened to our instinct.
Words of sweetness
drip from your lips
My mind takes in
what has been said.
I wrap my mind around
your "truth",
as your eyes beckon.
You love me, you say, I wonder why?
No reason to love a stranger
like me.
My mind shuts out cynical screams
to the sorrow of my soul,
Trusting.
Treading in water unfamiliar
Your eyes tell me to
believe I can.
I step out in faith of you
and your lying eyes
and watch the water
start to rise.
My knees, the water licks
like a puppy dog
with fangs.
To my hips now,
"Don't worry." you say
eyes sparking.
"Believe."
"Trust me."
"Woud I lie to you?"
You ask.
My stomach, water surrounds.
My breath is caught,
on lies of deceit.
I reach out, "Tell me how."
Silence.
Your eyes dancing.
Eyebrow rising,
mouth gapes in glee
to watch the water take
me under
where there is no Me.
You smile so sweetly,
sickeningly so,
"You should have known."
you whispered quietly,
to hear your own Voice.
"It was you, I wanted to be."
You watch from the surface
as I struggle for air
and walk away,
without a care.
Little did you know,
I knew how to swim.
I followed you to the shore
where your body
lands on the rocks,
like the slamming of a door.
Trusting no one
Walking away,
I have learned to defeat
to decipher lies.
You will never again
smile so sweet.
There is one person alone
worthy of my trust,
and that's
Me.
I am a pretty cynical person. When someone manages to pull one over on me, it is rare. I never forget it, though. It makes me a better person because it makes me aware. It gives me experience for the next one that crosses my path. They are always further and farther between...and I always think the same thing when it happens,
"Well, at least it will be a very long time before it happens again."
So, today, I am rejoicing a bit. At least I know it will be a long time from now. One less thing to worry about, I say.
I have a friend who is going through something similiar, who should have listened to her gut instinct and is now facing court battles and life long scars. This is also for her...
This poem is about the sometimes twisted and evil thing that disguises itself as friendship. How we desperately want to believe what is being said...and how all too often, we should have listened to our instinct.
Words of sweetness
drip from your lips
My mind takes in
what has been said.
I wrap my mind around
your "truth",
as your eyes beckon.
You love me, you say, I wonder why?
No reason to love a stranger
like me.
My mind shuts out cynical screams
to the sorrow of my soul,
Trusting.
Treading in water unfamiliar
Your eyes tell me to
believe I can.
I step out in faith of you
and your lying eyes
and watch the water
start to rise.
My knees, the water licks
like a puppy dog
with fangs.
To my hips now,
"Don't worry." you say
eyes sparking.
"Believe."
"Trust me."
"Woud I lie to you?"
You ask.
My stomach, water surrounds.
My breath is caught,
on lies of deceit.
I reach out, "Tell me how."
Silence.
Your eyes dancing.
Eyebrow rising,
mouth gapes in glee
to watch the water take
me under
where there is no Me.
You smile so sweetly,
sickeningly so,
"You should have known."
you whispered quietly,
to hear your own Voice.
"It was you, I wanted to be."
You watch from the surface
as I struggle for air
and walk away,
without a care.
Little did you know,
I knew how to swim.
I followed you to the shore
where your body
lands on the rocks,
like the slamming of a door.
Trusting no one
Walking away,
I have learned to defeat
to decipher lies.
You will never again
smile so sweet.
There is one person alone
worthy of my trust,
and that's
Me.
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Comment by albea
They say it is good for you, learn from your mistakes. But sometimes the consequences are quite the price to pay.
Live and learn...nahhh
Live and listen!
Comment by The Voices in my Head
The Voices in my Head
Why don't we? Listen, I mean? Why do we want to believe someone with a forked tongue, blackness, evil dripping and oozing? In hindsight we see these things so clearly. Why do we not see it at the start?
What I do enjoy, because I am a petty human being sometimes, is that others see the same thing. They watch what happens to you and then run off and think they are so special that it will not happen to them. These people deserve what they get, if you ask me.
I love to watch it happen to be honest.
And it will.
And I will be watching. Waiting. Smiling.
You have to find the little things to focus on when you are going through it. That never fails to bring a smile to my face. lol
Come back,
Voices~
Comment by katyzzz
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A sensational poem, it tells the whole story.
I , for one, don't have good instincts when it comes to friendship, I welcome so many, they work for a while, sometimes years, then something happens and those friends just go.
It is something I can't understand.
Why do people give up on friendship?
Search me.
Your poem was also very poignant, but in a different way to Lily's, I guess I need to extend my vocabulary.
katyzzz
Comment by The Voices in my Head
The Voices in my Head
Thank you for that! I really appreciate it.
Who knows why people give up on friendship. I suppose those that do just do not understand the meaning of the word.
The reason of ending a friendship simply because someone wants to take sides, though. That one...really gets to me. Very high school.
Thanks, again!
Come back,
Voices~
Comment by Moonbeam
Very good poem. But what else would we expect from u?
Ahh yes; the friendship facade. I think we've all experienced it somewhere in our lives. Mine was w/two people; one I'd only known two years, but who claimed I was second in line to her mother, on her list of people she "admired". When I ended the relationship, she later saw my daughter @ her business (Tiffany didn't know she owned the business, or wouldn't have gone in), & she told her she'd like to speak w/me sometime. I said, "Hmm; no I don't think so; remember that saying....fool me once, shame on u; fool me twice, shame on me? The shame will not be on me." The second person had been in my life for ober twenty years, & we had seen each other thru some of life's worst. The fact that I saw her thru what was likely the most harrowing experience she had, thru flashbacks, was probably the straw that broke the camel's back. I think she was suddenly uncomfortable w/everything she'd told me. Her son, who lives on his own now (he has a disability), still contacts me occasionally. Makes me curious as to whether she's fostered that in him or not, knowing that I can indeed be trusted.
Repeated, sweetly keyed ruminations from acquaintances via cyberspace, can certainly be a masquerade, but most always rears it's true, but ugly head when questioned or challenged. U continue to retain your faithfulness to self, because, as u stated yourself, u are the one person worthy of your trust. Just consider this another of life's lessons, & move on, holding your head high, & keep on wielding that pen!!!
Moonbeam
Comment by The Voices in my Head
The Voices in my Head
As a matter of principle, I must continue. Those J women sure aren't quitters! They would beat me! lol
As for friendship,
friendship is
looking someone in the eye
and seeing your own reflection...
...seeing a part of you within them
and vice versa
that makes you know
you're safe.
It is a new day...in the church of my life. Amen.
Voices~