Kristin WolgemuthLiving in Love
July 24th 2009 20:47
Living a life of love is the most important thing for someone to do. Not only does this make life enjoyable for that person, but it makes everyone around him or her happier, too. I’ve compiled a short list of things below that I believe are essential to living in love.
First of all, give. Give of your time, your money, your food, yourself. One of the most precious things you can give is your time. With the busy lifestyles that most of us lead these days, time is a valuable commodity. You can volunteer your time at a local shelter or food bank, help a friend or neighbor with something, or share time with your family and friends. You can even spend some of that time with someone who does not have anyone in life, like a shut-in. Or you can get a job in helping people.
If someone needs to borrow money and you can spare it until they can pay you back, go ahead and lend it. If you have some extra money and are only holding onto it so you can spend more on frivolities, try sending some of that money to a charity you believe in. Just give a little this week, even if it means tightening your purse strings a bit more next week. If, however, you can’t afford to give and live, by all means, don’t. Wait until you’re more financially secure to start helping others in this particular way.
Love sacrificially. By this I mean to give even if it hurts a little bit. Say there is a pile of dishes in the sink, and you’re avoiding it, because you hate doing the dishes. Let’s say your partner or spouse hates doing dishes, too. Why not do those dishes so your other half doesn’t have to? Wouldn’t that be nice to spare him or her that chore? I appreciate it when my husband does things I can’t stand doing, and I try to do the same for him. For example, I would be the one doing the dishes. I don’t love it, but I certainly don’t loathe it like he does. He mows the grass because that is something I hate doing.
Trust without wavering. This shows that you have faith in people (or in God, if you believe) and is important in developing meaningful relationships. Believe that the other person will do the right thing. Don’t expect- only hope. Believe in that person’s love for you, knowing that that person can also count on you.
Do good things even if no one is watching. It’s so easy to be lazy and do things half-way when we think no one is noticing (or won’t notice until we’re gone). Pretend someone is watching you at all times (again, if you believe in God, He is watching you all the time, so do good in His name), and do things in a way that will please that person. There is a lot of joy in making someone else happy.
Say you’re sorry. Yep, even if you think you are in the right, say you’re sorry for the disagreement. Say you want to work things out, not argue. Humility is the name of the game. Reconciliation is the point. This means that you are working on finding out what needs to be done to fix a problem, not to pound your point into someone else, making him or her feel bad or stupid. Try treating that person with the same respect and care with which you would want to be treated, even in a difficult situation.
Give support, not permission. If my husband says, “Mind if I go to Dave’s on Saturday afternoon?” he is asking simply whether I support his decision or not, and he is checking to make sure we don’t have plans already. He is not asking “Mother, may I?” I am not his mother by any means. If he says he wants to start boxing again like he did before we were married (he recently told me this), I have to tell him that I don’t support his decision, although I am certainly not telling him he can’t do it. In the end, it’s up to each of us to make the right decisions.
First of all, give. Give of your time, your money, your food, yourself. One of the most precious things you can give is your time. With the busy lifestyles that most of us lead these days, time is a valuable commodity. You can volunteer your time at a local shelter or food bank, help a friend or neighbor with something, or share time with your family and friends. You can even spend some of that time with someone who does not have anyone in life, like a shut-in. Or you can get a job in helping people.
If someone needs to borrow money and you can spare it until they can pay you back, go ahead and lend it. If you have some extra money and are only holding onto it so you can spend more on frivolities, try sending some of that money to a charity you believe in. Just give a little this week, even if it means tightening your purse strings a bit more next week. If, however, you can’t afford to give and live, by all means, don’t. Wait until you’re more financially secure to start helping others in this particular way.
Love sacrificially. By this I mean to give even if it hurts a little bit. Say there is a pile of dishes in the sink, and you’re avoiding it, because you hate doing the dishes. Let’s say your partner or spouse hates doing dishes, too. Why not do those dishes so your other half doesn’t have to? Wouldn’t that be nice to spare him or her that chore? I appreciate it when my husband does things I can’t stand doing, and I try to do the same for him. For example, I would be the one doing the dishes. I don’t love it, but I certainly don’t loathe it like he does. He mows the grass because that is something I hate doing.
Trust without wavering. This shows that you have faith in people (or in God, if you believe) and is important in developing meaningful relationships. Believe that the other person will do the right thing. Don’t expect- only hope. Believe in that person’s love for you, knowing that that person can also count on you.
Do good things even if no one is watching. It’s so easy to be lazy and do things half-way when we think no one is noticing (or won’t notice until we’re gone). Pretend someone is watching you at all times (again, if you believe in God, He is watching you all the time, so do good in His name), and do things in a way that will please that person. There is a lot of joy in making someone else happy.
Say you’re sorry. Yep, even if you think you are in the right, say you’re sorry for the disagreement. Say you want to work things out, not argue. Humility is the name of the game. Reconciliation is the point. This means that you are working on finding out what needs to be done to fix a problem, not to pound your point into someone else, making him or her feel bad or stupid. Try treating that person with the same respect and care with which you would want to be treated, even in a difficult situation.
Give support, not permission. If my husband says, “Mind if I go to Dave’s on Saturday afternoon?” he is asking simply whether I support his decision or not, and he is checking to make sure we don’t have plans already. He is not asking “Mother, may I?” I am not his mother by any means. If he says he wants to start boxing again like he did before we were married (he recently told me this), I have to tell him that I don’t support his decision, although I am certainly not telling him he can’t do it. In the end, it’s up to each of us to make the right decisions.
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