Trying to get back to normal
August 31st 2007 20:28
Alot has happened this last month. Tomarow mymom will be passed for 1 month. I finally brung the bag of personals out of the trunk where they sat a month. Put them on my dresser where they sat for a few days. Now yesterday i finally brung them out on the kitchen table. I think i'll hang her dream catcher up today.
A page from a journal i made for my mom the night i found out she died.. Kaitlyn drew the dreamcatcher.
So my family said there would be a memorial, then they said there wouldn't. My brother called again and said in three days there was going to be a memorial but that it was just for some of my step dads friends and that he wasn't going and neither should I. Because we werent invited. The day of the memorial my step dad called asking why i wasn't there? Seems the brother that told me hasn't going, and that we werent invited had promised my stepdad that he would invite me. For some reason he didn't want me there. I think it's about money. When my mom was extremy sick, he got her to make him power of attorney. Theres a law suit started over the hospital and nursing home because the blood poisening she kept getting was from poor care. I'm 11 hours away so i'm not saying what i believe or don't believe and wether i believe there should be a lawsuit or not. All i know is my brother keeps saying that if there is a lawsuit he gets it all because he was power of attorney. Maybe thats true, i don't know. When he says this, it's a slip up, and then he says, but i'm going to do the right thing and split it between everyone else. He doesn't mean it, since he keeps slipping up and saying he gets it all. He took mymoms seven thousand dolar blue racer or something electric wheel chair and pawned it for a hundred and fifty dolars. I'd have bought that. I need a wheelchair and i even told him that. Whats hardest for me is he wasn't even raised by my mom. We didn't realy meet him until he was 18 and then only saw him a few times here and there after that. but then when my mom is dying, he just moves from Arizona to Illinois and goes and see's her everyday in the nursing home. Wouldn't taht mean her death was kind of his fault too?? I mean, if she needed cleaned couldn't have have cleaned her, turned her and all that such? he called all the time telling me they werent taklng care of her but not to worry because he was with her every day. I think he didn't want me at her memorial with all my aunts and uncles taht i adore, and my other brother, so i'd look like i didn't care. He knows me and my husband are the only ones in the family with the money to fight him for the lawsuit if there is one, so the rest of my moms kids get some. I've just backed away from it all. Stopped answering my phone and washed my hands of it all. It just got to be wayyy too much. Worse, mymom never divorced her ex husband, so he may even get all or most of it. Thats horrible. 1, he left my mom for her best friend. 2. he touched my daughter when she was young. he shouldn't get anything. I don't care about the moeny. I don't care if i get one single dime, but i do care if they get it all. I'd rather there be NO lawsuit at all then them get it. Why do people go crazy when it comes to moeny!! Screw their own family just to get some. I'd rather walk away, but don't keep calling me bragging that mom wanted you to have everything. when i know all she wanted was you to follow her DNR order. She would have NEVER wnated it this way. I was very close to her especialy after i forgave her. Even before taht, i have always been in my moms life and close to her. I havent even gotten any of her ashes and i helped pay for her cremation. I'm sooo far away.
Washing my hands of it! Tammy
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