Junk Mail
March 3rd 2009 21:24
I hired a red trailer the other day. It matches my red car and red postie bike. I had to reject the green trailers at BP and go to Shell to get a red one. I hope no-one's house catches on fire and people think I'm a fireman, and expect me to put the fire out. I suppose I could spit on it for them. The pic is of the trailer parked outside my friends' place at Slacks Creek/Woodridge in the southern subs of Brisbane. It's so lush and leafy up here. Plus, Qld has the best weather of any place I've ever lived in. I'm going to settle down here. I might even pop myself the question and get married again. To myself. I'll send myself a flirt via the net just to let myself know I'm keen. I'll initially act disinterested. Then spend hours and hours text messaging myself, and chatting with myself on MSN. Play electronic ping pong. Then I'll refuse to meet myself unless I put a pic up or get on webcam. I'll play hard to get. Then I won't turn up to meet myself. I'll act like people do on the net. And really annoy myself. Then I'll stalk myself and send myself nasty messages.
The other pic is a hut at the entrance to a national park in Daisy Hill/Shailer Park. It's where I leave all of the bagged junk mail. It's my open-air drop-box. When I finish delivering all the junk mail or local rags which fit on the postie bike, I return there to reload, and off I go again. It saves returning home, which is 5 minutes away. It's all about logistics and planning. It's a great little spot. I thought about adding some walls, and putting windows in, and living there, but I don't think the Council will approve of the renovations.
The sorting process, complete with hard rubbish collection ironing board.
Collated, rolled and rubber-banded junk mail.
| 109 |
| Vote |
Subscribe to this blog
Comment by Teresa Ralton
MRS SMITH
READ THIS
SISTERS IN CRIME
Comment by Kleonaptra
Kalikapsychosis
Comment by Lady Henrietta Muddling
Potter in a Harry
I'm worried that you're actively soliciting stalkers.
A couple of days ago I came across a stack of local mags that someone was delivering, obviously, and I wanted one so I got out my trusty swiss army knife and cut the ties and took one. Do you think the deliverer would have been upset? btw, last I looked that thing I asked you to delete was still there! thanks
Comment by Lady Henrietta Muddling
Potter in a Harry
Yeah, it's perfect for the Carer's Pension. Most of the work is at home, collating, rolling, rubber-banding. It's only a few hours delivery twice a week. From memory, I think you're allowed to work 25hrs/week on CP.
It's reasonable pay if you get enough different pamphlets. They pay $30 for the first 1000 pamphlets and $12 per thousand for additional pamphlets. I usually get around 12-20, so each delivery is worth around $150 . I think I do about 1200 houses. [The local rag is 8c per paper, so that's worth about $100]. But I double up on the areas. As in I deliver the junk mail and local rag in the same area so it's only one delivery. (I'm not quite as dumb as I look or act.)
Comment by Teresa Ralton
MRS SMITH
READ THIS
SISTERS IN CRIME
It's even looking to me like I'm inviting stalkers but its just my habit of responding without considering the consequences .Your job sounds very pleasant. I remember the postie from where I used to live. He was always ready for a chat and knew all about what other people in the area were up to. When Australia post had that big overhaul for improvement it was very sad. David, I hope this is the last time I have to ask - sorry - 1st comment on Never a Dull Moment - Please. Thank you. It's happening automatically so I'd better be careful. Thank you again.
Comment by Damo
You are sure to see them in daylight.
Some people should be exposed to daylight.
Keep sending that junk mail I am using it to fuel my car.
Comment by Lady Henrietta Muddling
Potter in a Harry
You'll soon get over that if you stay on Orble long enough.
Comment by Lady Henrietta Muddling
Potter in a Harry
If I get exposed to any more Qld sunlight, I'll get mistaken for a Torres St Islander at the Dole Office.
Comment by Teresa Ralton
MRS SMITH
READ THIS
SISTERS IN CRIME
Comment by Tracy
Movies and Life
Comment by Lady Henrietta Muddling
Potter in a Harry
Done.
Comment by Lady Henrietta Muddling
Potter in a Harry
Nice to see you grace this momentous site with your presence.
And yeah, junk mail/local rag delivery is good fun. It's just postie work without the pressure. I'll be doing a few posts soon that will make Burke's Backyard look very pedestrian (not that you have to do much to achieve that btw). It will be Lady Henrietta Muddling's Front Yard (working title only). It will be all about how people are so obsessed with their back yards, they neglect their front yard and their mail box, and how I am their saviour, and I've come to rescue them from their ignorance.
Comment by Teresa Ralton
MRS SMITH
READ THIS
SISTERS IN CRIME
Comment by Janet Collins
Acceptable Etiquette
The Social Critic
Janet Collins Blog
Comment by Damo
Maybe we should make a blog about that.
Comment by Norm
Consumption Malfunction
Equal and Opposite
Arses and Elbows
Footy Power
Comment by alt_ed
Alted Opinion
ArtCombat
The Inner Saintdom
Comment by Lady Henrietta Muddling
Potter in a Harry
My mother was living with me at the share house. We were there short term while we search for a rental property, you tosser. I think I'd know a lot more about the carer's pension and caring for someone than you. Over and above that, carer's get two month's respite leave a year, you ignoramus. Now bugger off. If you haven't got anything constructive to say. And don't bother returning unless you can be civil and courteous.
Comment by Lady Henrietta Muddling
Potter in a Harry
Everyone on the net now has your personal addy, but I deleted the comment just the same.
Comment by Lady Henrietta Muddling
Potter in a Harry
ditto.
Comment by Lady Henrietta Muddling
Potter in a Harry
Posties deliver Aust Post approved junk mail.
I'm not a postie. I deliver generic junk mail and the local rag. I just use a postie bike to do it.
Basically, anyone can deliver junk mail/local rags. A lot of adults do it for exercise, etc. I do it because I like the nature of the job. It keeps me occupied and is a good balance of inside/outside work. As for the wages? It doesn't pay much, but because it's a low-stress [no stress] job I don't have to spend any of my wage destressing. And I can start work at 4am, which suits me. I'm not a night owl.
Comment by Teresa Ralton
MRS SMITH
READ THIS
SISTERS IN CRIME
Comment by Damo
I like junk mail more than I like sarcasm.
At least junk mail does pretend to be innocent when it is caught out..
If it is the local rag you can call it the local rag and no will disagree. However with sarcasm the sarcastic twit will throw their hands in the air and claim that they did not mean anything by that mean spirited person dig. Of course junk mail has no pretension about self worth. Where as sarcasm comes from a feeling of insecurity and self doubt. Junk mail does not try to start arguments. Where as sarcasm works from the assumption that everyone is as shallow and socially inept as the they are. It is not called the lowest form of wit for nothing.
So in short I will happily read tonnes of junk mail because it is far more real than any sarcastic twerp that it out there.
Comment by Lady Henrietta Muddling
Potter in a Harry
You had your opportunity to be courteous and civil. Don't bother visiting my blog any more. I'll be deleting all of your comments.
Comment by Lady Henrietta Muddling
Potter in a Harry
As long as you don't join Amway and put signs up on the wall like, 'I think I can. I know I can.'
Comment by Lady Henrietta Muddling
Potter in a Harry
I can't be bothered with Dickheads. I'll just delete everything he writes from now on.
Comment by Damo
It is my policy also.
Life is too short to bother with flies.
Comment by Norm
Consumption Malfunction
Equal and Opposite
Arses and Elbows
Footy Power
Comment by Damo
Comment by Norm
Consumption Malfunction
Equal and Opposite
Arses and Elbows
Footy Power
Comment by Damo
I heard that there was a big market for such things.
Comment by Norm
Consumption Malfunction
Equal and Opposite
Arses and Elbows
Footy Power
Comment by Damo
If I agree, then I say 'I agree'. If I disagree the I say 'I disagree'. I call it talking straight rather than masking my intentions beneath layers of confusion.
Life is too short pissing competitions.
Comment by Norm
Consumption Malfunction
Equal and Opposite
Arses and Elbows
Footy Power
Comment by Damo
There are lots of Jokes on the Net.
Just reading some posts cracks me up all the time.
People who think they are clever and intellectual but only do their research via activist websites.
People who throw tantrums when you disagree with them.
Urine artists.
People who engage in all manner of special pleading to justify their stance.
People who create a whole smear campaigns because they lack the basic skill to counter an argument.
People who write insulting comments and post offensive images on other peoples blogs then remove them quickly so they don't get in trouble.
Cult members who try to make converts on the net.
Paranoid people who claim that everything written is all about them, then cry to their friends who mindless believe them and cannot work out that they are being used.
I mean wow, there are just so many jokes being handed to me that if I pointed them out I would have no time post my own essays.
I may laugh alone but it is a good steady laugh.
Comment by Norm
Consumption Malfunction
Equal and Opposite
Arses and Elbows
Footy Power
Comment by Damo
I have no problems with not taking myself too seriously.
I have long awaited the joke at the end of the universe.
Comment by Norm
Consumption Malfunction
Equal and Opposite
Arses and Elbows
Footy Power
Comment by Lilla
From The Home Front
Enviro Warrior
Dream Herald
Esoteric Bookshop
That last photo impressed the hell out of me... now I have to meet you
As for the loverly trailer, I am curious why you hired it in the first place?
L.
Comment by Lady Henrietta Muddling
Potter in a Harry
Comment by Lady Henrietta Muddling
Potter in a Harry
I hired it because it was red.
Na, I need a trailer like that one for junk mail/local rag delivery. Can't afford one atm. So I hired one.
Oh, and to move again. That's right. I've been in Qld 5 weeks and already lived at three different addresses.