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With the new X-Files movie recently released an old favourite seemed to burst out of hiding to rejuvenate its own mythology. Bigfoot is notoriously shy but pathologically needy so recent capture reports seemed logical and reasonable. It was not to be, the ever so cagey Bigfoot managed to elude capture making dupes of some otherwise pretty credible guys.
The DNA tests were inconclusive containing traces of both human and opossum DNA. The second round will confirm what we know: this is no gentle, but firm, Sasquatch. All is not lost and innovation combined with technology brought us a physical hoax that could be tested. The days of blurry videos are over! The Bigfoot/Sasquatch Conspiracy has entered a new phase.
Swaggy is excited! The next breakthrough must have a body because eventually we'll get video confirmation through Google. While we wait patiently we can enjoy the hair re-generating, potency medication behind this exploitation of our global treasure.
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A police state wouldn't be so bad. Given the advanced nature of human rights issues in Australia the work required to maintain such power would be beneficial to the vast majority. The minorities will find joy in bonding against “The State”; it is what we like to call a “gain-gain situation”.
Social control is not bad or difficult if you are at the top or in the middle. Marmite’s success is proof of social control. Such a vile substance could never win legitimate support and a police state will undermine its pinkie hold.
With the police state you can force people to accept freedom and equality. We could have forced any religious school on Camden residents; their opposition squashed with prison sentences and death…I mean…clearly they aren’t the type we want in our police state anyway.
It is foolproof….In the future if, *chuckle*, the minority becomes the majority they’ll take power in a series of revolts and establish a new order. Just as nature intended.
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America is the great democracy drawing board where frail or developing democracies look for guidance and inspiration. In Australia we’ve already picked progressive-ish but the coming American election will tell us if we made the right choice. Shared values mean shared political misjudgements which will provide the best insight into how the election will unfold.
In order to see clearly one can never ignore the mundane. John “Gutter-Ball” McCain’s recent campaign ad called Paris Hilton, Britney Spears and Barack Obama “mere celebrities”. Now I have never seen the ad but I hear it alludes to the, untested, belief that Britney and Paris wouldn’t be able to run a country. These political pot-shots at Britney and Paris are as shameless and exploitive as kissing babies.
Picking on Britney. Slack.
Gutter-Ball’s grandfatherly appeal lulls babies into a false sense of security, avoiding tears, but for once his, bloody-minded and methodological, P.R. team has failed. The attack via Britney and Paris has been denounced! Gutter-Ball tried to backtrack behind humour “We think it’s got a lot of humour in it, we’re having fun and enjoying it.” When politicians tackle comedy it is usually a disaster; Pamphlet-Gate decided Lindsay in the Federal Election. Liberal campaigners distributed fake leaflets from “extremists” and “terrorists” praising the Labor party. The retiring, Jackie Kelly, dismissed it as “A Chaser style prank” just not a very good one. Gutter-Ball’s Chaser-style prank could be the first portent of doom.
Winning the Presidency means winning these small P.R. battles. Empty promises could prove too damaging; light entertainment is Gutter-Ball’s better option but he needs a comic advisor. I nominate Kevin Bloody Wilson. Take a think on Kevin Bloody Wilson whispering jokes to Gutter-Ball in Press Conferences…
Gutter-Ball with his Pinheads. Photo by: River Bissonnette.
Press Conferences must be taken seriously but only because each one opens a new warfront. While Gutter-Ball’s attempt to look hip has failed it was an early salvo but his next surge must be favourable or confidence will ebb and by the time he delivers his Youtube.com Climate Change promises it may well be lost…
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Sydney centrism in A-League coverage is annoying. Not only because they are poor but because it represents the disdain with which the other clubs are held by the men that control the media. or something.
Sydney will be tipped to win it all this year but they won't. The reasons why involve any number of curses, hoodoos but will come down to their first intentions
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Statistics can be misleading. Cristiano Ronaldo scored 31 league goals but he's a wanker. Likewise last year’s 6.7% pay rises for politicians might be old but fretting is forbidden etcbecause they have protection from the "baddies" inflation, petrol etc please see ACA for our woes. On the 14th of June this year the Parliamentary Remuneration Tribunal approved rises of between 4.2 and 14 per cent to allowances. Statistical grand truths are too abstract; consider an example of an existing perk/allowance for a real taste of the fringe benefit, the pork in the barrel.
Travel allowances are sweeeet maaaaaate especially when travel is demonstrably in the interest of the Commonwealth
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Alexander Downer, AKA Alexander Downer, starts his United Nations position today. “Alexander Downer” is leaving politics, well meaningful politics anyway, heading for Cyprus as a U.N. Special Envoy.
“Alexander Downer and the U.N.” could be the most inspired romantic comedy in years representing the culmination of a love affair between soul-mates. Both Alexander and the U.N. derive their authority from the past; for the U.N. it is “The League of Nations” and World War II, for Alexander Downer it is his father and grandfather. The Downers Snr were politicians and that name recognition allowed Alexander Downer to rise quickly to the newly created seat of Mayo in 1984. Alexander Downer has also been the beneficiary of redistribution. When 21.3% of the 1990 vote went to a Democrat there was redistribution, in 1998 when Downer held on by 1.7% there was redistribution. The historical record will show that the seat was “invented” in 1984 for a Liberal scion and whenever he looked like getting tossed his seat was secured for him. Anything that relies on dynasty to maintain its position is in trouble; consider the English royals or the Bush family of Texas. Add to this list the Downers of South Australia and Edward Downer is warned: Enter Federal politics and I will have your head on a pike
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Waiting for celebrity pundits to attach themselves to presidential candidates can create angst. Over the last month this anxiety has been eased by the emergence of John Della Bosca, D-Unit, and Belinda Neal, Bel, the new celebrity power couple of Australia and for Australia. Genuine power couples are rare in Australia; women’s power is historically located in home and hearth rather than parliament and party. So it was inevitable that someone would whisper “…like the Clintons”. It makes sense D-Unit and Bel are politicians, married and both look like they enjoy a cigar buuuuuuuut is that enough basis for comparison?
D-Unit and Bel have a string of misdemeanours but this is their first scandal deemed worthy of the “-Gate” suffix. Adding “-gate” is serious business referring back to the Watergate scandal of the 70s. Watergate was a seedy conspiracy involving political espionage, breaking and entering, corruption, illegal wiretaps. If a political scandal is significantly damaging then “-gate” is added; it must be professionally fit by hack, Iguana-gate, Granny-gate and Painter-gate are notable examples. The Clintons are involved in five separate “-gate” scandals setting a high standard for power couples everywhere. The original Watergate was a conspiracy to maintain power; Iguana-gate was a conspiracy over seating and, therefore, lacks the prestige of a true “-Gate” scandal
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The world is changing so fast it’s getting frightening; Spain are Champions of Europe and England are the great underachievers of football. That stable world has gone and democracy could falter next. Democracy’s continued importance can only be assured through technological innovations.
Today’s party leader is faced with the complicated task of locating and developing individual human skills, if capable humans can’t be found the party suffers. If humans are the problem then Liberalbot is the answer
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Comment by Jim Spears
on Free the Police
Political Pundit
A-League: The Asian Serie A
World-wide is too grand for such an openly repressive movement until the age of robotic warfare at least. Then we could this plan out for a spin...
I agree that we are in a state of flux but this is characteristic of any change in epoch. As historical periods change a dominant culture would experience the death of hope; there is nowhere to go but down. Perhaps we are in the process of resetting?
I'd argue that the bigger problem is not with individualist v collectivist but that "our" collectivisms are incompatible in the same way that French, British, Spanish empires were incompatible. The exception would be the Green Movement which has potential for global cohesiveness in future generations but that is tainted by political, economic disequilibrium. For now. My hunch is that the spirit of collectivism is returning (but it is just a hunch) and it has the potential to create a new, truly global, Civilisation. Maybe through the green movement, could Al Gore be the benevolent dictator? That is scary.
Sovereignty would make it difficult to impose one gov and multiple police-states would squash all rebellion in alliances. I'm a gambling man, where do we start?