I dont fit in
January 1st 2007 05:14
I dont fit into this world.. maybe this isnt my era. Maybe I was supposed to be born earlier or later I dont know.
I just want to meet ONE single soul, just one, whome I can relate to, connect with, adore, cherish care for and nurture even love and have it reciporcated.
I get alot of attention, yes! But its not the attention I want. I want someone I can do anything with, be whoever I want to be, say what I please and do as I feel. With no judgment.
I want someone who can sit in an empty room with me for hours on end and laugh and talk and share silence with me until we fall asleep content with how we feel.
I want someone I can be affectionate with, without the sexual tendencies.
I want to be appreciated. I want to be wanted to be around.
Im a happy person on the outside, but on the inside Im crying for someone! Someone I dont know who! Im craving to feel the aura of another human being who understands me. Who knows me without me having to utter a word. Who can just look at me and know we are soul mates. I want someone who will hold my hand and give me warmth. Thore out this iceyness that has spread itself within my walls and release me so that I can be me again.
People say they understand, they dont! People say they are there for me they care for me they adore and love me. They are empty words, when it comes down to it they arent there for me at all.
I put too much into everyone even those I dont know it is just who I am, I do this with the knowledge that I will get nothing in return. For whicih I dont care because Im kind to others, yet in time it soon makes me feel like Im just another face with reassuring words to help them through their day.
Who will help me through mine?
All I want is someone.
All I want is a friend.
I just want to meet ONE single soul, just one, whome I can relate to, connect with, adore, cherish care for and nurture even love and have it reciporcated.
I get alot of attention, yes! But its not the attention I want. I want someone I can do anything with, be whoever I want to be, say what I please and do as I feel. With no judgment.
I want someone who can sit in an empty room with me for hours on end and laugh and talk and share silence with me until we fall asleep content with how we feel.
I want to be appreciated. I want to be wanted to be around.
Im a happy person on the outside, but on the inside Im crying for someone! Someone I dont know who! Im craving to feel the aura of another human being who understands me. Who knows me without me having to utter a word. Who can just look at me and know we are soul mates. I want someone who will hold my hand and give me warmth. Thore out this iceyness that has spread itself within my walls and release me so that I can be me again.
People say they understand, they dont! People say they are there for me they care for me they adore and love me. They are empty words, when it comes down to it they arent there for me at all.
I put too much into everyone even those I dont know it is just who I am, I do this with the knowledge that I will get nothing in return. For whicih I dont care because Im kind to others, yet in time it soon makes me feel like Im just another face with reassuring words to help them through their day.
Who will help me through mine?
All I want is someone.
All I want is a friend.
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Comment by Ash
Australian Traveller
Flashes of memories
Comment by katyzzz
Photography Tips
MS Paint Art
And what does the friend want?
A dog will give you everything you want. That's something to think about.
No, I am not being unkind or negative, I am simply giving you something to ponder upon.
katyzzz
Comment by David my David
You know that old idiom. (thank goodness I didn't make a typo there!
The old idom is:
Man's best friend is his dog. (Pretty sexist these old idioms, huh?
I'm a dog of a man Vizza. Ask anyone. Ask me.
I can hardly walk down the street anymore ... too many mailboxes with vertical slots? Too many electric light poles? Too many fence posts?
And it's not so much all of these things per se ... It's the way people paint them nowadays ... it's all a bit modern for me ...
I'm not a leg-cocker ... I'm actually a human being ... Us men .... we stand up ...
won't go on much about this ...
I'll let people read the ...
text*
sub ...
I'll tell you one thing though ... I love your honesty and openness ...
When I compliment you on that? That's me offering you friendship ... (Your pic? on you blog? Attitude ... I love it!
And so far ... you've got my vote for the BEST POST OF 2006 and the BEST POST of 2007 ...
Keep them coming ...
Me? I paint pictures with words.
My sister? She paints pictures with paint brushes ...
My sister? She's not computer illiterate ... or ignorant ... she just prefers real painting to using a computer ...
My sister and me?
We no longer speak ... She's in the corporate world ... pity ... I actually love my sister ... My poem 'Speckles'?
I wrote that about my sister ... One day ... I was just sitting there thinking ... Oh, my God, what if my sister dies before she ever retracts her letter to me ... telling me she'll never have any contact with me again ... because she thinks I'm a complete and utter loser ...
My sister? I love her ... But she laid down some pretty hefty rules in this letter ... Very EXPLICIT! ... She wrote and said to me ... If you ever live with mum again ... I am never speaking to you or writing to you ever again ...
Well, I respect her word ...
I never contact her ... but we were the closest siblings on this planet at one stage ...
So I'll put up an occasional poem about how much I love her ...
Sometimes my nastiness makes me put up stuff i really sholdn't put up about her ... but I've forgiven myself for my own nastiness ... I'm trying really hard not to do that much any more ...
But sometimes?
My humanity?
My nastiness spills over onto the page ...
Other people? Their nastiness ... ?
That's something their own consciences have to deal with ...
I'll tell you openly and honestly ... If you want a bloke to just sit around with you ... and do nothing else but that ...
I am certainly not the bloke for you ... If I was in the same room as you and you were dressed like you are in your pic ...
Woof! *** Grrr. Howl & Bark ... (sorry there's a bloody dog outside ... and I type all day long and sometimes forget that I'm typing to someone ...
Just trying to hone my writing skills ...
Gonna be a writer one day ... My sister? She's gonna be a famous artist one day ...
xxx
David ...
Comment by Always Eighteen
Always Eighteen
I once found someone who I was completely comfortable with. The problem was, I was too much of myself that it turned that person off.
So nowadays, I'll always be wearing my mask. Is it a good thing? Depends how you look at it.
Comment by The Voices in my Head
The Voices in my Head
We are all searching for someone to understand in some capacity what we have gone through, going through, feel, think, and are.
The truth of the matter is that that is a hard thing to find. Elusive, not impossible.
Keep writing like you are and you may find the person you are looking for is within. *smile* ( I am given to cliches lately. lol)
I think we are at our loneliest when we do not understand ourselves enough or believe in ourselves enough to know what qualities would make a good friend for who we are. We search for people that we tend to want to be like. Then, we get to the core of them and understand its not the case, so we move on. Keep searching for who you are...the rest will follow.
Voices~
Comment by Hope
Gifted Parenting
Freelance For Life
Comment by Oblivion
Vizza, from all that I have learned thus far (which is not much)...always be yourself. I remember when I was at a point where... I was always worrying over things, things that I had no qualm to worry over. I worried over what I'd do with my life, who I would spend my life with, what kind of person I would be... all these questions at this point now...are irrelevant for me. All this Time! People look high and low, reach into the farthest corners of the world to find...whatever it is they are looking for. It is not because the questions that we ask ourselves are not important. We are just not looking in the right place. It is right under our nose. I have already had all the answers inside of me.
Neo: "But if I already know, how can I make a choice?
Oracle: "Because you did not come here to make the choice, you've already made it. You're here to understand *why* you made it."
My answer is pretty much the same as Voices. Look within.
Hope I helped. My thoughts are with you.
Mark
Comment by ChrisB
Formula 1
The Social Centre
I think that we have to make compormises with all our friends, family and aquaintences. It's tough to expect people to give everything that you want, and that they will get everything they want in return. Little compromises, sacrifices and reservations are what hold relationships together.
Comment by vizza
LONG TIME SINCE I POSTED
'MIA' was my best friend..
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Formula 1
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