The Voices in my HeadI am Evil.
December 29th 2006 00:48
I am an evil person...I'm not saying that to tease, to kid or to jest. I am. I was actually told that once. It must be true.
Evil.
It oozes from me.
My four children are terrified of me...you can see the fear in their eyes when they give me a million and one kisses and hugs everyday. Poor things.
My best friend of 23 years hates me...except when she calls if she needs help with something. Other than that, well, that and when we share, cry and laugh. Other than those things, she hates me, too.
My brothers hate me. My mother hates me. My father really hates me. Except when they tell me they love me, of course.
My nieces and nephews, all eight of them, prefer that I not come to their house at all. They have actually told me that. It seems they would rather watch me from a distance in my natural environment...in my home...where they stay all night. Alot.
God bless those kids. They keep me in my house so that the public at large doesn't have to deal with me. Those are some selfless kids.
My co-workers despise me. That's why they crowd around my port and laugh over my stories. It's true. They do. If they keep me at my port, I can't roam around spreading my evilness to others.
Everyone is on guard. They watch me. Just so they know where I am at all times.
My cellphone is full of numbers of friends, family and even strangers I met at Walmart. All of them answer their phone when I call, just so they know where I am, what I am doing...they need to know that I am not out boiling bunnies or putting up flyers containing private correspondence.
Oh, and GOD, those girls at the center that I created those programs for, so they could feed their children, they hate me, too. It's been four years since I have worked there. To this day, they still remember...they still talk to me at the stores and show me their children. The one's I only helped to feed so I could spread more evil. Those girls know it...they keep their eyes on me all the time.
At my funeral, there will be no tears. It's true.
Not from my children.
Not from family.
Not from friends.
No one will care.
I will be surprised if anyone comes, actually.
Maybe I should be cremated...who would visit the grave of someone like me?
I wouldn't....well, if it weren't me.
My headstone will be plain white...a small, tiny marker. It will say:
"Certifiable, Bipolar Freak"
or maybe:
"Virtual"
or maybe even:
"Unloveable."
or it might just read:
"Whose going to pay for this?!"
Memorial Days will be barren for me. Computers cannot visit gravesites, you know.
What will they do with my job?
What will they do with my house?
My kids?
My writing?
My degree?
My husband?
My friends?
My pets?
My stocks and bonds, my retirement, my 401k???
God, that's a lot of stuff, isn't it, that no one will want anything to do with. Why bother? I should just live a very boho life.
Less stuff to burn when I am gone.
The letters I have written to my children for major milestones in their lives, all tucked away. Surely no one will want those either.
Sad, isn't it?
I just wish I wasn't so evil. But it can't be helped really.
I am what I am.
Evil.
It oozes from me.
My four children are terrified of me...you can see the fear in their eyes when they give me a million and one kisses and hugs everyday. Poor things.
My best friend of 23 years hates me...except when she calls if she needs help with something. Other than that, well, that and when we share, cry and laugh. Other than those things, she hates me, too.
My brothers hate me. My mother hates me. My father really hates me. Except when they tell me they love me, of course.
My nieces and nephews, all eight of them, prefer that I not come to their house at all. They have actually told me that. It seems they would rather watch me from a distance in my natural environment...in my home...where they stay all night. Alot.
God bless those kids. They keep me in my house so that the public at large doesn't have to deal with me. Those are some selfless kids.
My co-workers despise me. That's why they crowd around my port and laugh over my stories. It's true. They do. If they keep me at my port, I can't roam around spreading my evilness to others.
Everyone is on guard. They watch me. Just so they know where I am at all times.
My cellphone is full of numbers of friends, family and even strangers I met at Walmart. All of them answer their phone when I call, just so they know where I am, what I am doing...they need to know that I am not out boiling bunnies or putting up flyers containing private correspondence.
Oh, and GOD, those girls at the center that I created those programs for, so they could feed their children, they hate me, too. It's been four years since I have worked there. To this day, they still remember...they still talk to me at the stores and show me their children. The one's I only helped to feed so I could spread more evil. Those girls know it...they keep their eyes on me all the time.
At my funeral, there will be no tears. It's true.
Not from my children.
Not from family.
Not from friends.
No one will care.
I will be surprised if anyone comes, actually.
Maybe I should be cremated...who would visit the grave of someone like me?
I wouldn't....well, if it weren't me.
My headstone will be plain white...a small, tiny marker. It will say:
"Certifiable, Bipolar Freak"
or maybe:
"Virtual"
or maybe even:
"Unloveable."
or it might just read:
"Whose going to pay for this?!"
Memorial Days will be barren for me. Computers cannot visit gravesites, you know.
What will they do with my job?
What will they do with my house?
My kids?
My writing?
My degree?
My husband?
My friends?
My pets?
My stocks and bonds, my retirement, my 401k???
God, that's a lot of stuff, isn't it, that no one will want anything to do with. Why bother? I should just live a very boho life.
Less stuff to burn when I am gone.
The letters I have written to my children for major milestones in their lives, all tucked away. Surely no one will want those either.
Sad, isn't it?
I just wish I wasn't so evil. But it can't be helped really.
I am what I am.
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Comment by albea
Yes you are evil...
Thank you for being my best friend.
I cannot stand to be around you...
Thank you for being there through this very difficult time in my life.
I hate you...
Thank you for never giving up on me.
Evilness oozes all over you...
Thank you for the shoulder to cry on
Who would even show up at your funeral...
How am I gonna live without you.(sniff)
I wish you would just go away...
I thank God for you everyday.
You are truely the Bestest Friend anyone could ask for..
I love you!
Nae
Comment by The Voices in my Head
The Voices in my Head
Thank you...I hate you too, you evil bitch. lol
I will be there, (because I am too evil not to be.)
No matter what you need, I will get it, do it, be it (just so you will have to owe me...)
Whatever, wherever...(evil is omipresent)
However. Always. (Evil is eternal)
No matter what. (Evil triumphs)
*smile* (evil smile, of course!)
Voices~ (demonic ones, of course!)
Comment by LaurenD
Your evil friend with a very evil laugh,
LaurenD
Comment by The Voices in my Head
The Voices in my Head
Cleansing, isn't it?
Thank you for your friendship...of course, you DO know I am all about the take part of the friendship. I give nothing. Just so we are clear. lmao
Tell me, Friend of my Darkness...what is your most *evil* quality?
Voices~ <--silly...err..uh...EVIL. Definitely.
Comment by LaurenD
Well, I pretended to be the devil today on the good reverend's blog.
That's evil, especially since my current post is about not being anonymous. Alas, I could not resist. I wanted to see him argue with the devil. And I did. That kind of thing gives me a quiet pleasure. So very evil.
LaurenD
Comment by The Voices in my Head
The Voices in my Head
Wait...what post? I wanna see!
Lurking evilly about...
Voices~
Comment by Moonbeam
And what is evil spelled backwards?
Live.
And u do it so well, girl.
Your funeral, & I don't even want to think about that, will have a line of teary-eyed admirers starting @ the door that will wind around the parking lot.
U may have evil moments, but don't we all? That's what keeps us going. Gotta have a little fun, don't we?
Love u, Auntie Moonbeam
Comment by The Voices in my Head
The Voices in my Head
Thanks for that reminder~
Love u,
Voices~