Get It Done With Emotional Blackmail
June 23rd 2010 14:13
Link: www.wittysam.com
Jay Sampson loves emotional blackmail
"Who would have thought I could get people to do as exactly what I want with the simple tool of Emotional Blackmail!" Jay explains excitedly.
Jay Sampson plans to teach others how emotional blackmail can make a positive effect in people's lives. "Everyone should be emotionally blackmailing each other! It's simple.. and it's so much fun manipulating people."
"Get It Done with Emotional Blackmail" is the title of his upcoming seminar. Jay says he wants to reach as many people as possible to teach the fine art of emotional blackmail to get stuff done by people whether they want to do it or not.
"So many people have a bad impression about blackmailing others. But I have written 3 books and spent hundreds of hours putting together a seminar... I gave up my high paying job for you people. I have done everything and suffered so much to help others. What more do you want?" begs Jay.
Jay says people are truly only motivated to do stuff for you when they are emotionally blackmailed, "That's exactly how I got my parents to do everything for me growing up." Jay is well aware of his critics and plans to make some pretty "angry threats" if they don't leave him alone. "I just don't understand why they are trying to ruin my life!"
Although it seems Jay might be a little disturbed, he is determined to make his demands very clear, or there will be consequences if the people that have signed up to go to his seminar next Wednesday don't come. "I want to let you all know that I have all your details," Jay begins, "So for example, Henry Aaron who lives at 412 Brand St, Roselands. He says he has a tentative hold on his relationship with his wife. Well Henry, I have some photos of you hanging out in a strip club being inappropriate with a stripper. I will make the photos disappear when you turn up at my seminar and stay for the entire 3 days."
Let's hope Henry Aaron and everyone else turns up at Jay Sampson's "Get It Done With Emotional Blackmail" seminar. If they don't I may get into a little hot water if you know what I mean.
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Comment by Journeywoman
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Fun post
Comment by Samantha Banfield - Witty Sam
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I had heaps of fun writing this one - and laughed heaps in the process... not maniacally though.
I was inspired by a true event in my life and changed it to be set within the seminar environment.
It is quite irritating but it's fun to have a laugh at it!