Ciao 4 Now
June 29th 2009 06:34
I always thought that one night stands would be fun and exciting, filled with danger and passion. Instead my last one (not that I have many, only 2 in my life) was filled with drunken groping and maybe 2 minutes of me pretending I was having fun until Mr ‘Best lover in the world’ happily passed out.
I don’t know why I did it in the first place, bedding a complete stranger never really crossed my mind before. Maybe I was on the rebound after the end of my 18th month relationship and just wanted to feel affection again – but I don’t think so, affection has never been my goal.
Maybe it was because this guy was a ‘bad boy’. With his bald head and tattooed neck, and the $3k he had in his wallet. He was different than any of my ex boyfriends.
After this business was done, I didn’t snuggle, I didn’t talk, I just got dressed and went outside for a ciggerette. He followed and just looked at me expecting to say something.
I got the whole “You are welcome to stay” What a gentleman ..
Yet I declined.
I wanted to go home, sleep in my own bed, so I didn’t have to do the walk of shame in the morning. I didn’t get his number, I didn’t ask for him to drive me home, I didn’t acknowledge the fact that it even happened, we just spoke about work, family, etc etc for the length of our ciggerrette before I decided to leave.
Is this how one night stands happen now? Is it just expected that once the business is done it’s ciao for now?
There is just this raw honesty, no pretending (except during the actual deed =)), No comfort snuggling and no being together to regret it in the morning.
It’s just shag and leave, no shame, no respect, nothing.
And yet I didn’t even mind the fact that I could tell he didn’t really want me to stay, I didn’t care that I had to spend half an hour getting home after 2 minutes of the deed, it didn’t affect me in the slightest. Yet my friend hooks up with a guy, or gets his number and if he doesn’t message her within 24 hours, she is heart broken.!!
Why is it different for one then to another?
I don’t know why I did it in the first place, bedding a complete stranger never really crossed my mind before. Maybe I was on the rebound after the end of my 18th month relationship and just wanted to feel affection again – but I don’t think so, affection has never been my goal.
Maybe it was because this guy was a ‘bad boy’. With his bald head and tattooed neck, and the $3k he had in his wallet. He was different than any of my ex boyfriends.
After this business was done, I didn’t snuggle, I didn’t talk, I just got dressed and went outside for a ciggerette. He followed and just looked at me expecting to say something.
I got the whole “You are welcome to stay” What a gentleman ..
Yet I declined.
I wanted to go home, sleep in my own bed, so I didn’t have to do the walk of shame in the morning. I didn’t get his number, I didn’t ask for him to drive me home, I didn’t acknowledge the fact that it even happened, we just spoke about work, family, etc etc for the length of our ciggerrette before I decided to leave.
Is this how one night stands happen now? Is it just expected that once the business is done it’s ciao for now?
There is just this raw honesty, no pretending (except during the actual deed =)), No comfort snuggling and no being together to regret it in the morning.
It’s just shag and leave, no shame, no respect, nothing.
And yet I didn’t even mind the fact that I could tell he didn’t really want me to stay, I didn’t care that I had to spend half an hour getting home after 2 minutes of the deed, it didn’t affect me in the slightest. Yet my friend hooks up with a guy, or gets his number and if he doesn’t message her within 24 hours, she is heart broken.!!
Why is it different for one then to another?
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Comment by Elisabeth Fraser
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I do hope you find a partner - even a one nighter, who has perfected his skill and presents you with the 'costliest orchids' rather than dandelions.
It's a sad indictment on men, and they're not 'gentlemen' in any sense of the word.
Lis.