Orble - Average Guy

Average Guy

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The road goes ever onwards............

June 11th 2008 07:18

Well its been 22 days since my last post and up until Sunday, I've been pretty postive, upbeat and focused although from Sun onwards, I've felt my mood flatten and found it very hard to snap out of it.

Although its nowhere as bad as in the early posts, the memory is still very fresh in my mind and still fear going back to the darkness!

What has suddenly changed to make this mood swing? I'm not sure although guess one trigger is the usual one, eg relationships or lack of one ? The second is I think too much about certain things and well don't know what else really? Its just very frustrating at times and just dislike feeling this flat!!

Do you know when I was much younger, I guess I sort of scoffed at the concept of love and thought it was pretty sissy, (I'm talking about teenage years) but now when you don't have someone to share it with, I realise just how important it is and what a major part it can play, everyone needs someone to love and be loved by I guess.

Not too much more I can or want to add at this time.

Average guy

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Depression -its okay to feel sad

May 19th 2008 08:56

Last week was okay, even with the passing of a close colleague, I even felt like my old self again, although on the day of the funeral, I felt pretty emotional and low and this feeling rumbled on into Sat. That evening I had friends and colleagues round for a meal which was fun but I still felt flat, low and emotional. this could have been the final shock of the funeral or maybe the bottle of wine I had drunk didn't help.

It must have been pretty obvious as my friends seemed concerned and called me the next day. Sun felt better and as the sun was shing decided to go for a walk taking photos, doing this lifted my mood somewhat and when you are feeling down, focus on the stuff that you do enjoy and put into second place the other non fun stuff.

I guee I just have to persevere with this although I have noticed at present I seem to be a bit more short tempered than normal and not taking any lip from people. Hopefully bearing no other major triggers I can slowly put this behind me.

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Bit of a tough day.................

May 9th 2008 19:38

Until Friday I had been feeling so much better, almost like I was in a different place, I felt more positive, focused and actually achieve a full days work. Although we had some very bad news at work on Fri regarding a close and respected colleague and now its left me feeling fairly unsettled.
Just from things I had overheard leading upto being told, I had an idea what was coming from prevous past experience but sitting all in a room and being told, then taking in how people who hadn't realised reacted wasn't nice.

The thought did cross my mind that this is what it would be like when someone close to you sucumbs to those thoughts and it wasn't a nice thing to see actually. Afterwards I felt very sad but not flat as I had been previously, although I went out last night, my heart wasn't in it although the person I met seemed very nice, I think a mixture of this and still in love with my ex hasn't helped there.

So today woke up early feeling flatter than I have done all week and its times like this when someone to give you a hug is pretty important. Next week will be tough as everyone will realise that it has happened and not a dream, so glad I have my counsellor appt on Mon night again.

Until later

averageguy

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Depression-Light at the end of the tunnel?

May 6th 2008 08:37

Thank you for your previous comments Peter and those words you heard somewhere?

Today has been my best day so far since May 1st when this started, I actually felt motivated enough to cycle to work in a 1deg chilly Chch morning. I wouldn't say that I was happy and I still have that shadow of a doubt in my mind of the past week or so but I'm hopeful that bearing no triggers that cause a relapse, then things should be on the up

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Depression- is there a way through it? Continued

May 4th 2008 09:15

The hardest thing when dealing with depression is how your feelings can change just so quickly. Earlier today I was out with some friends when I could feel a low coming on and had leave before bursting into tears. Felt quite low until a friend called around a couple of hours later and we just chatted, my mood slowly raised I felt better than I did.

This is one of the things that is helpful, having friends, partners,family that do get it and understand what you are going through, people who won't judge you etc. And if some people don;t get it, then find someone who does

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Depression -Is there a way through it?

May 4th 2008 03:12

Four years ago I suffered from a really bad period of depression, but got through it with good friends and work. I had put this all behind me until just over a week ago, it reared its ugly head once more. I know the triggers and this time I wasn't prepared for the strength of the spike.

Just over a week ago, my dream girl who i was just starting to allow myself to fall for, told me that she was still in love with her ex, they had been in touch and had talked about getting married. How she had done this whilst dating me was a huge suprise

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June 2008

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