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"Neil is a sexy fox".
That's what an ex-University colleague said to me one night, as we bitched, whined and complained about the Village Baker's Delight. Did I mention she works 6 - 9 weekdays baking your block loaf under the pseudonym "Sci Fi Fan #1" ?
But is Neil really a sexy fox?
Well, Neil is an interesting specimen, the object of my good friend's desire. Sci Fi Fan #1 was born Katherine Alabrandi in Ballarat, Victoria on the 3rd of September 1987. She is 20 in 2 weeks - maybe even less. Alabrandi is now a sophomore, drafted by La Trobe University's Media department at the tender age of 18, having scored exceptional results in her final year of high school studies, making her the most sought after talent in 2005's nationwide tertiary draft.
Possessing bushleague determination, terrific work ethic and a hard nose for assignments, Alabrandi is set to become a contender for Channel's Nine's coveted anchorperson scholarship. In a recent interview, Alabrandii said "That way I don't have to pay for it" despite having spent $200 on Macromedia's Dreamweaver 8 package a day prior. When questioned by aspiring police regarding the purchase, Alabrandi allegedly sighed "oh, Roger Federer, how hot is he? He's hot. I love the dark hair"
The moral of the story? Katie Alabrandi is a confused young woman. And Neil? He's still living off a steady diet of McDonalds, Trumpet and Hungry Jacks.
Dear Blog,
It's been a while since I have opened you. Your header colours, whilst seemingly ever vibrant, are gathering cyberspace dust and fading from a cool, fresh blue and fiery summer red to a swimming pool blue and washed out pink. The cute, cartoonish wave you sport is caked with a tranluscent grey, the colour and texture of cobwebs. Oh blog, how shabby you have become.
I've been away for many months, blog. Have you missed me? I've been through three jobs, deferred my studies and taken holiday leave from my former position. I would have sent you postcards, but I hadn't the time. I'm sorry, blog. I wish I could promise that I'll write you more frequently, but my mother told me to never make promises I can't keep. My current job and other commitments are keeping me under wraps.
Yours Truly and Forever,
Anthony
P.S.
Did anyone get the MC Hammer reference?
“A girl’s been stabbed!”
“She was chased through the library. The guy was wearing a mask!”
A mild panic struck the students of La Trobe University. At 12 pm, May 8th, approximately an hour after a woman was hospitalised after a University stabbing, fragments of a horrific attack shook the campus. It’s amazing what detail your mind procures when you know so little.
“Mum’s been trying to ring. Probably wondering if I’m okay.”
And to a friend, near the library: “Yeah.. yeah.. what happened? It was a girl?” and then a bit later, to the class: “they’re not sure what happened. She was walking with her books and she got stabbed”.
I was late for my 11:00 AM tutorial. At 11:13 I saw an ambulance arrive on the West wing of the Borchardt Library. Somebody was being taken away. It didn’t look serious. A friend of mine had just left her class when it happened, and knew nothing of the event.
40 minutes later, when rumours had spread, everyone was wondering – when did it happen? Is the guy still around? Is it safe to leave the class? All we knew was that there had been a stabbing. And two hours after the U.S. Tertiary massacre, the offender returned. Did we have a copy cat?
Currently, the identity of the attacker and the victim remain unknown. The woman was stabbed and rushed to hospital where she, allegedly, remains in a stable condition. It happened on the second floor, in the Library’s toilets. There is no evidence to prove or disprove that there had been a chase or a mask involved. Let’s hope she is stable.
Today, too, I had an experience that I hope I shall understand in a few days...
A few days later, I still don't understand. Why oh why do I have 3000 words to write over my Easter Break? Jorgen Leth can't help me now. No, I'd need to be the Perfect Human to work a near 20 hours, attend 3 parties, 1 comedy festival and polish off these assignments for Monday week
[ Click here to read more ]
As an almost fitting tribute to Fawlty Towers, a male robber stole some bread and shot his female accomplice. But, being the true romantic he is, the man fled the scene carrying his darling lady's bullet-riddled, blood-tainted body ( well, one bullet ).
Charlie Chaplin - slapstick artist
The thieves didn't intend to steal bread - they wanted a whole lot of cash, but were less than delighted to find fresh, wholesome bread. When they attempted to take the actual money from the two Restaurant owners, the male thief got a little excited and shot his lady friend, while " SKYLARKING " with a loaded weapon. That's right, skylarking! The all-encompassing term befitting of any death, suicide or murder
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After a long break from blogging, (a change of residence - which is a circus by the way, don't try it - I had no active phone line ) I started to gain some perspective on the world. All of a sudden, I had plenty of blog topics and nowhere to write them (other than paper, which is SO last century).
It looked a little like this
But during a long, unseasonable - for melbourne at least - drought, I noticed that rain has suddenly become something alien, and feared ! A short stroll from transport to Uni found me caught in something of a drizzle, but it's stiff reception was unprecedented. You'd think people would be happy, but it seems that everyone has forgotten what rain looks, and feels, like
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I love your legislation
I love the way you talk
I love the fact your name is John and not George ( cause that would just be weird
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When you're talking about fashion, image and projecting a sense of individuality – it’s important to note the influences of that particular trend. After all, where would EMO be without Simple Plan?
Your everyday, garden-variety emo
But what happened to the world when EMO became a style of music – synonymous with hardcore and punk. If you aim to project individuality, a sense of unique style and diversity, are you a walking contradiction when EVERYBODY does it? After all, you can’t be different if different turns mainstream
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Where can I find a beautiful girlfriend ?
Human Bonding
I learnt that one when my Italian relatives came to Melbourne. Sadly, I did not find una ragazza bellissima, but now that I can say it in two languages, doesn't that double my chance of finding a woman? Perhaps if I learnt German, Spanish, French and internet slang ( like lol, rofl, imo, atm... many of which I still can't understand !! ).. maybe then I would increase my chances beyond sight
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Brilliant minds are of such extraordinary substance... Had we known DNA and molecular science in the 1600's as we know it now? Maybe everything would have been different...
Galileo, whom I love dearly.
In 1632, we knew a man of brilliance, of exceptional worldly talent. 1632 saw this quote: "Eppur si muove." But it does move. But it does. A mature voice of experience, of wisdom and understanding centuries beyond that of his peers had spoken in a free exchange of concepts. In today's "free market economy", which is anything but free, we may revere and mourn the loss of a talent that offered so much and received so little
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Comment by AnthonyB
on Films you love when you are sick....
When I'm sick? I love the entire Family Guy series, from season 1 onwards. LOVE IT !! That, or the Sopranos, and American Pie and Road Trip have never let me down. I love my movies so much !
Thanks for the lovely post !
- Anthony