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Sometimes I wish my ways were different, That I wasn’t the same
That I didn’t try so hard, that I stayed off my game
But I put work on these females, I got em on lock
Have em wondering, did he love me, or did he not
And truly I don’t get it, I don’t understand
Cuz I never care about em, as much as their ex man
So if ur a female and u like me, stay the fuck out my way
Cuz Im the Casanova baby, and il take ur heart away
A year ago, I was tad violent
Fist to face, that’s the only way I vent
I looked for conflict, searched all night
Cuz the only thing I wanted was to fight.
And I took on all comers, even the challenging
It can be one man, or his whole battalion
So when I saw 5 guys, I didn’t even hesitate
They were my dick and I was about to masturbate
Give em a beating, in case u didn’t get it
Like a fine girl, I was bout to hit it
One looked at me wrong, then he pulled out a knife
The nigga walked to me, bout to end my life
I said make ya move homie, he took the bait
So I ducked right down, now time to retaliate
Right hook, went right for the spleen homes
Snatch the knife quick took it for my own
Then I stepped to the next man, quick and deadly
He wasn’t ready nigga, and my aim was steady
I ducked down from another punch, knife right at the rib cage
then what I didn’t expect someone pulled out a 12 gage
oh shit, I hear shots fired!
I reached for my chest man, thinkin Im dying
No time to think dog, I moved away
From my bloody foe, cuz I was okay
Grab the shotty nigga, used it to fuck this man’s face up
The butt met his nose, he was havin no luck
Turned to his friend, barrel to his eyelids
Didn’t even stop, to think what I just did
My aim on lock, I know this shit son
Ready to pull the trigger, on this nigga
So I do what I do best, strap to his chest
Next thing I know, I c bullet proof vests
S-w-a-t all around me
But they too late nigga, I done pulled that trigger
And I didn’t realize, who they were immediately
So I aimed the gun and they all fired on me.
It was just a fight, I ain't see this commin
And cuz Im not a punk, I ain’t see me runnin
I mean fuck homie, this shit ain’t okay
Am I gonna die? Will this be my last day?
I think of my god while in blood I lay
I think of my moms, as I start to pray
I can’t go out like this, on the street without a name
I can’t believe I deserve this, when I finally lose the game
Paramedics arrive on scene, late as usual
What am I saying; my life is a blur,
When she comes to my side, I don’t even notice her
On the gurney, neck brace on me
That’s as far as I got, till I passed out homie
~
Awake in the hospital, bruised and sore
Looked for the date, days I been out was four
Then I talked to the doc, asked my affliction
I was suddenly unhappy, what's with his diction
Give it to me simple; try not to waste my time again
He looked me in my eye and said, you’ll never walk again.
The end
fuck this. I just cant do this... i mean. i cant take that your so fucking happy with him only days after you were so happy with me. its bullshit. i mean, you hated him. you didn't love him ever. he was a drain on your freedom and he frequently disregarded your feelings. threw around threats of desertion like it was nothing. and you, being constantly afraid of being abandoned, let him act any way he pleased.for 6 and a half months you gave up your life. and then you found me, and i presented a choice. freedom. someone who'd be there no matter what. id let you truly live, and id show you how to be happy. and you were. you were flying high, till he called. over and over. again and again. he'd cry, or yell curse you, or claim he loved you like no other. but all of that was deception. he did not love you. he loved having you to control. to be under his will. he never had to search for someone to give him his way. and because he loved that enough to come to your house to beg for it back, and call a hundred times crying, you let yourself believe that he loved you, you let yourself forget how he treated you. and now you claim to "love" him back. i have never seen such powerful words handled with less care. i was sooo good to you! even when you were first dating him, you talked to ME on the phone every night. saw ME everyday. told me how much better i was that him. and yet your back in the bitches arms. giving him what he wants. but its ok. i see how you stare at me from crossed the room. missing me. wondering what could've been. i see how you start to question yourself. and i know there will be a time, when you'll realize why you first left him. and you'll come crawling back into my bed. only to realize, that place id saved you, kept warm and safe, is now filled. and theres no room for you in this new order you have created. and you'll morn.
i aint gonna LOVE NO HOE, not even a little bit
cuz bitches try and fuck u, but im stayin celibate
so take back ur long hugs, take back your soft kisses
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i am selfish u know, not worthy of the little talent i possess. surrounded by beauty my fingers ache to describe, and i give u tales of my sorrow. pathetic. i don't deserve the words i have. when u talk to me, u might not see my eyes. maybe somehow i blinked at the same time that u had ur eyes open. maybe u just weren't looking hard enough. maybe u just didn't notice. its not like there's anything there, its whats not there. lifeless, like some sort of life sized doll. i forgave, really i did. and i closed my eyes and held them shut as tight as i could trying to forget. but i can never be like i was before. like if u break something and superglue it back together. it will be back together, but ul always see that little crack where its it was broken, if u look hard enough. i am broken, a shell of my former self. and it shows. u can always tell if u look hard enough, in the right light, u can see the fractures. and just like that poor thing u broke, when u apply pressure, i start to crumble under the weight.
my life kinda sucks but its the only one i got.
id say death is an option, but we both know its not.
i say jail seems possible, 3 hots and a cot
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Comment by Achilliez_Heel
on water womaN
World opinion of the US.
world
The Worlds Problems
From The Heart
WhatEver~
Food~for~Thought
Her~Thoughts
sorry i wasn't logged in
JUL:~|DEL